I never remember to call her on her birthday.
Ever.
We’ve been friends for 17 years, and I always call the day before or the day after, but never on the actual day.  I’m pretty good at remembering dates, I’m just rarely aware of what the date is today.
I think we’ve been friends for as long as [...]

I’m not perfect.
None of you are surprised to hear that, I know.  But my point is that not only am I not perfect, but I have no desire to appear perfect.  Not to you or anyone.
There’s too much pressure in perfection.  Besides, most people know it’s a lie, don’t they?  I know I have, at [...]

“Are you nervous or excited?” I asked.
Jared looked up from his half of the admissions packet we were filling out for our new marriage counselor.  He shrugged one shoulder and contorted his lips the way he always does when he doesn’t want to talk about something.  If he could have disappeared into the brown paisley [...]

When I was growing up, I wanted to be my Grammy.
Actually, when I was first growing up, I wanted to be my Nana.  As far as my preteen eyes could tell, Nana was rich with money and royal blood.  She was fashionable and commanding.  She knew things that no one else in the whole world [...]

“It doesn’t matter if you go to the ocean to fill up a thimble or a bucket, the ocean doesn’t care”
- Wayne Dyer
There is no better place to ask questions than beside the ocean.
Because the ocean doesn’t care.
You can wade into the ocean fat and white, with puckered thighs and dimpled cheeks.  You can lounge [...]

My therapist described it as going up a mountain.
Right now, it feels more like falling on my ass.
Over
and over
and over again.
Unless you’re rock climbing, you don’t go straight up a mountain.  You go around it.  And it can feel like you’re just going round and round in an ever looping circle.   You can pass by [...]

There is no good way to ease into this.
My husband, Jared, and I have decided to separate for 3 months.
No, we’re not getting divorced.  Yes, I understand that separation is, in many instances, the “first step towards a divorce”.  And it is, if I’m being honest, a possible outcome here.  But it is not, by [...]

I’ve written a lot of really personal stuff here.
I’ve talked about my marriage – the good and the bad.  I’ve documented my depression as it was happening.  I’ve used this blog to communicate with my husband via “open letters“, often revealing on the blog things I couldn’t say face to face.
And yet, yesterday, I wrote [...]

“Alright, Mom.  I have to go.”
Our morning conversation was beginning to bleed into my working hours and I could no longer ignore the screams from my inbox.
“OK, baby.  I love you.”
“I love you, too.  Thanks for listening to me be a raging whore all morning.”
“Mmm… I’d say raging bitch.”
“Oh.  Right.”
“Technically I don’t think I can [...]

I’ve been writing on this blog for almost three years.  It has always been a personal blog – more personal than most, I’ve been told.  But it wasn’t until recently that I understood why so many people were baffled by my openness here.
Tuesday night, Adam and I arranged to have dinner with a blogger who [...]

Family is everything to me.
Everything.
It is the beginning and the end of who I am, where I come from, and where I want to end up in life.
So having my husband be on a completely different page than me when it comes to what family means is hard.  Beyond hard.  It’s fucking heartbreaking.
Jared and I [...]

I received a request from another blogger to do a post here. Specifically, they wanted to know what *you* – meaning you, dear reader – had to say about a certain topic.
Personally, I think that says quite a bit about you. Mainly, that you’re outspoken and engaging and awesome and basically the best [...]

…rarely drive more than 5 miles over the speed limit.
…own multiple hot glue guns. Which I’ve used.
…can sew.
…hate recapping. If you ask me how my day was, I’ll tell you it was “fine”.
,,,would rather have salt than sugar. That includes chocolate.
…never wear nail polish.
…have had 14 brothers and sisters.
…am genetically an “only [...]