I’ve often said that you can learn something from everyone.
I realize that some people think that’s terribly naive and idealistic, but I’m getting used to (and slightly more comfortable with) the fact that someone will always think the beliefs I hold dear are stupid. Such is live and all that.
Of course, some people can teach you more than others.
Jared, for example, has taught me to see the value in life beyond the extremes. My mom has taught me that family is bigger than time or space.
And Mr. Washington was the first person who taught me that no one is all good or all bad.
Dennis Washington was a fourth grade teacher at Lincoln Elementary in a small Iowa town. I was in the third grade when I first met him, and he’s the first teacher whose full name I made a point to learn.
The administration had decided that I was beyond the third grade curriculum, but my parents insisted that I was not going to be skipping a grade – one of the few options given to advanced students at that time. Instead, I would be in a regular classroom with kids my own age and I would be allowed to work at my own pace. For some subjects, I would be sent to the fourth grade class room.
That’s how I found myself in Mr. Washington’s fourth grade reading class.
I remember thinking that he was brilliant. Although looking back now I realize he was probably short for a man, at the time he seemed like a giant – tall and solid in his starched white shirts and dark dress pants. His skin and hair were fiercely dark, in stark contrast to the whites of his eyes and teeth that seemed to sparkle when he would smile and laugh – which he did often.
It’s important to note that he was black. While I grew up in a family that boasted more black uncles than white and nearly all of my cousins called themselves “mixed”, he was the first black man I’d ever met in a position of authority. He would remain the only black educator I would ever encounter throughout my Midwestern education. The significance of this was not lost on my 10 year old self.
I would come home from school and rave about Mr. Washington. I can’t recall a single reading assignment from my tenure in his class, but it’s impossible to forget the positive energy that pulsed from within his classroom.
He pushed us. Pushed me, in a way that no one had. He challenged us to use our minds and look at the world with new eyes. He pleaded with us to take hold of our destinies and make a difference in the world. He lectured us, at times, about the dangers that we would face and the opportunities that we would have to make the right decision.
He was the first teacher I had who spoke openly with us about the reality of drugs. He talked about how important it was for us to believe in ourselves, to believe that we deserved better than what drugs could offer us.
There was no doubt in my mind that he was one of The Good Guys. The best, in fact.
I was surprised to learn that some of the people in my extended family knew him. Surprised especially to discover that it was the people who had been in and out of jail that seemed to have some kind of prior association with him. They called him Dennis in a way that suggested a sense of familiarity.
I asked him about this connection once, and he laughed in that way that adults do and said “oh yeah, yeah, yep, I know her. Tell her I said hi!” And a part of me reveled in the knowledge that he and I shared some special link that no one else could understand. I beamed when my aunt told me she’d seen one of my teachers who told her I was “one of his favorites” and “special”.
Mr. Washington was easily one of my first heroes.
And then my mom woke me up early one morning. She said she needed to talk to me about something. She told me Mr. Washington wouldn’t be at school when I got there.
“Baby, he’s been arrested.”
My young mind spun. I couldn’t fathom what horrible misunderstanding could have lead to this injustice. I begged my mom to tell me why, to explain to me what was going on.
“It has to do with drugs.”
And everything clicked into place. His connection to those people. The fact that the association went beyond an old acquaintance from a distant past.
“But I don’t understand,” I cried. “He HATES drugs!”
My mom explained to me, in a meek attempt to salvage my faith, that he had been arrested for selling drugs. I could see that she was trying to offer me a small piece of consolation in the fact that he hadn’t actually been using them himself. And I admit, I held on to that scrap of knowledge as I tried to make sense of the confusion and hypocrisy.
I went to school that day and didn’t say a word about his absence. It seemed like no one else knew that the world as we knew it had just been blown up. They saw a substitute teacher and simply assumed that Mr. Washington was out sick and would return soon. I couldn’t bring myself to tell them the truth I had heard that morning. The thought of scandalizing him to my peers made me sick to my stomach.
Of course, eventually, they did hear the truth. Or parts of it at least. I heard whispers about police and drugs and jail. We were eventually told, with no explanation, that Mr. Washington would not be coming back. I couldn’t for the life of me tell you the name of the teacher who replaced him.
It didn’t take me long to work out my own story in my mind. He was desperate to support himself. Everyone knew that teachers didn’t get paid nearly enough – it was a constant source of discussion in the news and among our parents. He was just looking for a way to pay the bills, and made a choice that I was certain was tearing him up.
I have no idea if any of that is true.
I don’t know the details of his case or the punishment he received. I have no idea, despite some intense googling over the years, whatever became of Dennis Washington.
But I still imagine that he was haunted by the way he disappointed us.
I believed then as I do now that he was a good man. I believed in his sincerity and I continue to allow myself to be inspired by a known drug dealer.
And some people will say that is naive or idealistic. Foolish even, I suppose. But I learned at a young age that no one is all good or all bad. And that sometimes the best you can hope for is to have a chance to be touched by The Good.
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Posted in Miss Britt - stories, memes and random facts about me Tagged: dennis washington, drugs, judgement, non fiction, stories, teacher
Personally, I hope for a chance to be touched by The Naughty.
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I couldn’t tell you the first name of any of my elementary school teachers.
One of the 5th grade teachers at another of the elementary schools (a male teacher) was arrested for selling drugs when I was in 6th or 7th grade.
I sounds like Mr. Washington had a lot going for him. And maybe just a single weakness. It’s nice that you can see past his shortcoming.
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The only two elemetary school teachers I remember were Mrs. White (she was black) and Mr. Allgrove. The latter because he had the hugest nose any of us kids had ever seen. Thus his nickname. Mr. All Nose.
I was 7. C’mon.
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All I remember from school is that the principal and vice principal were having an affair. It’s always nice to have something to hang over their heads when you’re facing suspension.
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I haven’t had a black teacher growing up or even in college yet.
Growing up in CA that has always surprised me, growing up in the town I live in it has not.
There is one teacher that I will always hold dear, she taught me Biology and left such an impact that years later it became my major in college. She told us once after we asked her why she never went into research (we were discussing cancer as she recently had a family member die of it) or became a doctor or something. What she told me has always stuck with me: I teach because instead of being one person doing something I can inspire several others to do something. I teach biology because I can see a crowd of scientists, doctors, and researchers sitting in my classroom and if one of them rising up to the challenge that it one more it would have been had I not taught.
Needless to say she’s left quite an impact on my life and even some of my beliefs when it comes to religion and science.
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(I really liked this post.)
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See, you and, we’re sooo similar.
We both see the very best in people, even when they do things that would make normal folks question that any good exists.
We’re not so much Pollyannas, but maybe Pollyana’s rambunctious cousins. We could make T Shirts and sell them.
Only I don’t think we’d cut the tips off our fingers mailing them out.
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It’s quite painful when someone we hold in such high esteem lets us down in some significant way. I’m glad you were able to hold on to the good he gave you and I pray that when he came out on the other side of his troubles his good side carried him on to a better place. Good that you got to see the best in him.
FMD
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That really moved me. To the point that even *I* — never having met him — want to know what happened and what became of Mr. Dennis Washington.
You were such a smart little girl who has grown into such a smart woman. I can only imagine how proud your Mom was — and is — of you.
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This is probably not what you want to hear, but if you’re genuinely interested in finding out what became of him, the state department of corrections probably has some information (parole officers, etc.) I doubt that kind of info is public, but there’s a chance you know someone in law enforcement who might be able to call in a favour. Just a thought.
Like some other commenters, this post made me think back to my own education. The biggest fall from grace I experienced was with a high school english teacher who was “strongly suggested” to leave after “an incident” with a student who was of age.
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Great post…thank you.
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oh how i agree that people are not all good or all bad…but i still get so sad when the bad side comes out.
growing up i had plenty of black teachers. one of my favorites was a woman whose name i don’t believe i can spell properly, but she was from africa and married to a man from africa. she looked so exotic and beautiful, even though her frame was not what americans consider beautiful. and she had the smallest gold stud piercing in her nose. back then, that was a rarity. and so intriguing. the woman spoke and we all listened to her fascinating views. thankfully she was an art teacher because her gift to us was her outlook on the world and its beauty. hope mrs. ekunfeu is happy somewhere…
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I’ve learned that sometimes the best people are the ones that wear their imperfection on their sleeves.
I hope Mr. Washington got himself together is and is doing well.
The Department of Corrections in that county probably has a Web site where you can look him up — at least you’ll know if he landed back in jail or not.
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I think Mr. Washington was a decent man.
I have known people who get involved in things that are bad, but they are good people.
Just confused or mixed up or truly a part of the wrong crowd.
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avitable: I seriously question your reading comprehension sometimes.
delmer: yeah, I wonder if he knows that there are students like me out there who think of him that way.
B.E. Earl: *snort*
Undomestic Diva: really?? That’s it?? Damn.
Sarah: oh wow, that is awesome. I hope you get the chance to tell her that she made a difference for you.
Iron Fist: (thank you)
TSM: Pollyana’s rambunctious cousins. I like that.
Fu Manchu Dad: yeah, it is painful – it’s something that shakes me up still when I see it. You’d think it’d get easier with age and experience, wouldn’t you?
Dawn: if I manage to find out, I’ll let you know. Thanks for caring.
SciFi Dad: most of the people I know are on the other side of law enforcement. LOL But you’re probably right that if I wanted to I could find out.
~jtm: and thank you for saying so. Much appreciated.
hello haha narf: I know, you and me and our sad for the bad. I know exactly, exactly what you mean when you say “sad”.
And how much do I love that even as a child you could appreciate all kinds of beauty?
Finn: oh man, if that’s what happened – I don’t know if I want to know!
But yeah, that’s a great observation. I’ve always found it’s easier to trust someone when you KNOW what their imperfections are, as opposed to someone who is working very hard on hiding them.
Kate: I agree.
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Well, in all sincerity, like I told you on the phone, I thought this was a great post and very well-written.
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This post is perfect. I feel the same way about people…just because there is something bad, it does not negate the good I have seen in someone. A lot of people don’t understand that kind of thinking at all.
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I love your story. I’ve been teaching for 35 years. My son, who is 28, makes more money than I do. I also choose to believe that Mr. Washington sold drugs to help support his family…since it probably was true.
I hope that you look for Mr. Washington and communicate to him how much he meant to you. A great deal of my former students are now my ‘friends’ on Facebook. When they let me know how I inspired them, I want to take the note to Publix and try to buy groceries with it. I’m being silly, but honestly these notes help me to get up in the mornings and keep doing what I do best…make learning fun.
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That was a wonderful post Britt.
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Do you REALLY want to know what ever came of Dennis Washington?
Great post! I really felt what you were saying.
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I liked your post very much. I agree, too, that there are people who are both good and bad. Our choices show where the line is in us. I am a firm believer in second chances, and third and fourth ones as well…… I hope Mr. Washington got one. :peace:
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I can so easily name every teacher I had until college and can recall specific quirks and talents of each. Perhaps it is because I wanted to become a teacher myself or possibly because my world came alive in a classroom.
It sounds like he challenged you beyond your comfort zone and really taught you how to love learning. He gave you a gift beyond the norm by teaching you this desire to learn. It is what all teachers should hope to instill in students…
He would indeed be a rarity in today’s “teach to the test to improve our scores” classroom. I am afraid too many teachers are bypassing a teachable moment because it doesn’t fit the day’s lesson. What a shame that the NCLB act does not measure a child’s love of learning!
After reading your “tribute” to his teaching, I need to reevaluate my opinion that teachers who sell drugs should be put under the jail. I
tend to believe that teachers should be held to a higher standard because they are models for the young…that they are imperfect humans but still should be law-abiding.
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We all have a few skeletons. And nearly every one of us have at least a few paradoxical elements to our nature.
RE: “…taught me that no one is all good or all bad”
Easier said than done, but whenever I think I don’t like someone, I tell myself that that person has good qualities too, though they may not be immediately apparent to ME. With just a little bit more thought, however, at least one good thing usually comes to mind about them, even when I don’t that them very well (good parent, whatever). Concentrating on the good in that person helps to cool whatever animosity, or disappointment, I may be feeling.
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That’s too bad Britt, did it ever make you wonder “What the heck were you thinking?” Argh!
On a lighter note: I couldn’t blame him in the least given the fact that I’d have to be consuming mass quantities of drugs to voluntarily enter a classroom full of fourth graders.
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I remember my teacher’s, too. 1st, 2nd, 3rd grade- clear as anything. (And like you, I was supposed to move up a grade and my parents wouldn’t let me! So I did the same thing as you! Weird. Oh except i was in 1st grade…)
Anyway, you’re right – there is good in every single person. There has to be. I mean, at some point, every single person was an innocent, helpless baby, and babies are not evil.
This was a really good post!
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Oh please excuse my typos – they make me crazy to see!
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I had a high school English teacher who was arrested for shoplifting. Turned out that she had a whole closet full of stuff she had stolen from stores all over the area. But, she had LOTS of problems and made full restitution. She was determined to be incompetent to be tried so they just sent her back to teaching.
In all seriousness though. I think it’s good for people to learn at a young age that not everybody is all good or all bad and to learn to take the good while acknowledging the bad. He made mistakes and all that, but that doesn’t mean that the “good” part of Mr. Washington wasn’t still good.
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Amen to that sister. There IS good in most people, and certainly in this man. He seen what drugs can do to people and tried to prevent his students from falling victim, just as he had. I give him praise for that.
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i would guess your gut is right
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I had a similar experience, right at the same age, only with a family member who I idolized. It blew my little DARE educated mind all over the place and led me to conclude fairly early on that nobody is perfect. Or that everybody is. Something like that.
I just found your blog a few months ago and its rapidly become one of my favorites! :peace:
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I don’t think it’s naive or idealist in any way. I believe that there is good inside of everyone and that we are human. We all make bad decisions in our lives. It’s the people who profess to be perfect all of the time that scare me.
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I like to think the best about people and hate it when I’m disappointed. I’d like to think that Mr. Washington was really a good person caught up in something beyond his control. If only he could read your words about him. He’d be proud of the person you’ve become today.
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A harsh lesson, but a true one all the same. I know adults who still haven’t learned this one.
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What a touching story – and so true. All of us are shades of gray, regardless of the color of our skin. Thank you for sharing.
And thank you so much for stopping by – I love hearing from my friends!
Hope you have a wonderful day!
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Sometimes not knowing is the best..
However, like someone else said – I’m a firm believer in giving second chances..
and 3rd.. 4th..
Ya get the point!
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Such a wonderful post, hon.
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It’s great to see you did and still do, hold him in high regard. Regardless of his “faults” you didn’t hold it against him because of the most important part … The actual *impact* he made in your life.
And though, there was quite a bit of looming hypocrisy in his teaching – based on the outcome – I believe he truly meant those words he spoke. Wanting to keep you (all of you) out of that painfully harsh realm of life. It’s a shame he had to succumb to it, though. I hope all worked out well for him.
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That is a great story. What a tough lesson to learn at such a young age.
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Teachers are gods to kids at that age, you know? What a harsh lesson to have forced upon you, that a revered god has fallen. I’m sorry you had to go through that, but it sounds like you’ve kept his most important lessons.
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Moral polarity (i.e., someone is *either* good or evil) is far more naive and idealistic. Some of the most beautiful and enlightening moments in humanity have been created by some pretty contrasted individuals:
- Thomas Jefferson, a slave owner, wrote the Declaration of Independence, the foundational definition of what we understand as modern basic human rights
- Shah Jehan, a polygamist, built the Taj Mahal, a lasting symbol of eternal love for the one woman he loved
- Michael Jackson gave us Thriller, a fun musical adventure in which we were able to feel entertained and mildly horrified by his perversity.
O.K., scratch the last one. Anyway, good post, I totally agree.
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I too have never had a teacher that was black. Did not have class with a black student until I was in junior college. All twelve years were spent in a public school, with no black children. And, not the same school, 3 different schools. However, this is not surprising and only one of those schools is open to this day and it is till 100% white by population.
Now, on to more important stuff, I am a teacher. I only hope that I touched one person the way that Mr. Washington touched you…b/c the lesson was a good one regardless of how it came to be.
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Britt –
Good post.
I also think, as children, we tend to view all adults (especially our own parents) in almost a ‘God’ like way, and it’s usually many MANY years later where we come to that realization. Some people never even reach that understanding that the ‘adults and other Main Authoritative people’ in our lives, are just that….people. Human, and by virture of that ‘Err’.
Think about it….how many people still cringe when thinking about their own parents having sex??? *giggles as I know some people reading this are STILL cringing*
But perceiving those in our lives as not being the Gods & Goddesses we thought them to be, but as a human being, with both good and not so good traits, goes along way to instilling Tolerance and understanding in our fellow man.
A Good post!
~ZZ
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Isn’t it just so true. No one is perfect. And no one is bad. It’s shades of grey. I wish we can all learn to take the best from what we see. Nice to see you keep the good. That’s the only way to inspire others to look past our flaws.
And anyone who says you are stupid… Let me quote Bernie Mac (RIP): “I ain’t afraid of you mother&%$@#”
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ah, the crushing blow of having your childhood naiveté blown all to hell.
That’s a pretty tough blow for such a young age. I am also envious of your parent’s decision for you. I skipped third grade.
I wouldn’t recommend it.
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What a beautiful tribute to humanity.
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