How do you recap three days in The City That Never Sleeps with one blog post?
You don’t. So start thinking of at least three different ways to say “I’m so glad you had fun!” and “Looks like you had a blast!” Because this? Is just the beginning.
Speaking of beginnings…
We begin this trip in the Express Curbside Check In line of a certain airline that does not understand the term “Express”. Or “Check In”. Or “maybe you should tell people ahead of time that you’re going to try and charge them $20 a checked bag” and also “you cannot check more than one bag at the curb.”
This certain airline was completely unprepared for a certain blogger who was more than willing to repack two suitcases into one right there in the Express Curbside Check In line because YOU CAN SUCK MY COTTAGE CHEESE ASS IF YOU THINK I’M PAYING AN EXTRA $20 AND WAITING ANOTHER HOUR IN LINE NOW.
Despite a certain airline’s best efforts, Karl and I made our flight.
Once we landed in The City, we met up with a certain other blogger and did our first very authentically New York thing: we stood in line and waited for a cab.
The cab driver was very surprised when we asked to be taken to a hotel like regular, average tourists.
He clearly thought we were actually Very Authentic New Yorkers on our way to visit regular, average tourist friends.
A few minutes and one Homeland Security Investigation later, we hit Midtown Manhattan.

Ahem. ANYway. We pulled up to our “hotel” on 45th street and proceeded to not at all check in. Apparently only real hotels that are not booked on Priceline expect you to check in when you arrive after three in the afternoon.
No problem. Whatever. We called Cissa and told her we had arrived and called a certain other blogger and told him to get his ass to our hotel and start playing tour guide.
We went inside to see the craziness that is “Yes, this is fucking Grand Central Station” and get food.
Not that I was at all overwhelmed or anything. At all.
Ahem. ANYway. We ate. We chatted. We made certain bloggers who were playing tour guide miss their train home. And all was right with the world.
After hugging a certain blogger goodbye, someone insisted that everyone stop at the Grand Central Market.
Apparently someone has a very bizarre obsession with Real New Yorkers.
Ahem. ANYway. Fast forward to the next very exciting portion of our trip which was…
Raise your hand if you are getting tired of the “real New Yorkers” bit. Now take that hand and SUCK ON IT! HA! (That’s what Real New Yorkers say.)
Lest you think that I am going to bore you with every insignificant detail of our first night afternoon in New York City, let me assure you I will not. Because someone did not take a single picture of meeting Dawg in a Starbucks, or stopping to eat ice cream at a Ben and Jerry’s, or going to Cissa’s hotel, or buying shoes in a Payless.
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Posted in Photo Essays Tagged: BrittCon, New York City, photo essay


















It’s not a successful trip unless Britt’s shoving someone’s meat in her mouth.
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You look like you had a blast. Love the pics. Hope you show more!
:cheese:
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Street meat sounds really appetizing. But it looks fun so far!
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I like pictures of buildings. :cheese:
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ok, not just “buildings.” we are talking NEW YORK BUILDINGS. and c’mon, that fucking CHRYSLER building is spectacular. you done good!
(i have a few photos of us meeting dawg at starcocks, but none of us shoveling ice cream into us at a rate that caused you to holler “mah belly hurts” several times. no pics of cissa’s hotel and thankfully none of our payless extravaganza.)
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Very nice. At least I have another day to put my post together. Probably more than one. I’m not doing another marathon epic like I did with TequilaCon.
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@Avitable :clap: :clap: You totally win!
I dunno Britt. All those pictures of building and your talent with photoshopping… well, hell, ANYBODY could have gotten those pics. I’m afraid you’ll have to find some other way of proving to us that you were in New York.
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looking at your photos has me missing NYC. of course I was only there, for the first time, last April…but I so want to go back when it’s warmer.
And….I didn’t take my husband with me when I went either. I had more fun without his whining. He’s sort of a homebody.
Glad to see you had a great time!
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:help: What is this New York of which you speak? :dunno:
:lmao:
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Your pictures look GREAT!
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Yeah, but these are fantastic pictures of buildings.
So glad you had a great time!
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You’re officially a New Yorker if you ate street meat.
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Be careful how you use “street meat” in a sentence. Be very careful.
What exactly happens when an NYC cabbie loses his shit?
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Only a classy lady like yourself would take pictures of a New York cemetery.
You rock.
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So when are you going to talk about the smell? Seriously. I adore NYC but smell is something altogether unique.
Glad you had fun. I wanted to see the shoes.
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As it is my duty, this URL has been forwarded to the NYPD for investigative purposes.
No… not for the tunnel picture. The “Real New Yorker” you have highlighted in Grand Central looks shady.
He must be from Jersey.
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There are buildings in New York? Hmmm…..
Did you know that those guys sneeze and cough all over that street meat? Sometimes they even pee behind a building and come back to serve it WITHOUT WASHING THEIR HANDS!!!
I saw it on 20/20 one night.
Really.
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I really love your photo essays. They are one of my favorite things about your blog.
Did you “cry on the inside” after eating the street meat?
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I :heartbeat: New York.
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avitable: uh, technically that is MY meat I’m shoving in my mouth. I paid for it. It’s mine.
themuttprincess: I took about 1,000 pictures this weekend. Literally. You want to see them all?
Amanda: so far, so good.
Sheila: oh good! Because I have about 400 more.
hello haha narf: if there is no picture, there is no proof. At no time did I yell about my belly.
Ever.
Karl: going through the pictures is insane.
bluepaintred: really?? I’ve never heard that term used for that.
AmyD: maybe I should go back and try again.
dana: everyone else would advise you NOT to go back when it’s “warmer”. I wouldn’t mind taking a trip when it’s a little bit cooler.
Dee:
smart ass.
Tori: aww, thanks. Some of them look like ass too. LOL
Iron Fist: thank you.
I have tons and tons and tons of pictures with no people.
Maria: woo hoo!!!
kapgar: he starts hollering and rambling and wagging his finger at me.
Bucky: what? is that tacky?
Shit.
Nat: I only noticed the smell a couple of times actually. But I think I have an insensitive sniffer.
NYCWD: just don’t tell them about the tunnel. Or me flashing the ESB guards.
metalmom: is that why it tastes so good??
Jan: thank you.
No, after eating the street meat I did a lot of moaning on the outside about “Oh my GAWD – best. food. EVER!”
And it was. Mmmm. Soooo good.
Selma: me too.
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I’d like to know more about Homeland Security and the cabbie who lost his shit!
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How many times did you think you were going to die during that first cab ride?
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oh there were twats about your painful belly. that is proof. and also? there is a photo of you looking miserable and holding your belly! i know this because i took it.
want me to post it? hehe
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jeliss!
and stop saying cottage-cheese-ass omg. SO not true. we all saw the loving-yourself blog post and your ass is tight!
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In europe, they call them terrourists to help keep things straight.
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Sounds like you enjoyed every minute of your stay in NY.
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Maybe I can photoshop myself into a picture so that I can pretend I’ve hit made it to the big time apple.
Did you eat pizza? I want the truth about a long debated issue : New York Style or Chicago Style? Seriously.
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Damn. HTML coding doesn’t work. Figures.
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And it was super fun to meet you, too. I’ve never experienced a stronger “exactly like I expected” than I did with you. Rock on.
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Sound spectacular so far! And wow. Those buildings! Beautiful!
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It looks like you had a great time. The pix are great.
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Awesome… You won’t happen to be in or around Atlanta on Friday, Jul 11 will ya?
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Hand gestures are under rated in the world of tour guiding. So far, aside from the evil corporate satanistic boogerheads at the airline, it looks like a fun time! I eagerly await the next installment!!! :clap:
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Did you get any shots of the stinky garbage bags out on the street at 5:00pm. I always think it is a nice ending to a nice summer day!
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I love Grand Central. Did your New York guide show you the Whispering Wall down by the Oyster Bar? I’ve done it and it’s freaky!
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Lisa: I’m sorry, I have been sworn to secrecy. At least, I think what he was saying was something about secrecy.
Finn: ummm… I don’t think any. I don’t remember paying attention to the traffic.
Because – HELLO! Buildings!
hello haha narf: whore
Crys: um, I was SITTING on that ass, yo.
whall: I can see how that would be useful.
Mindy: well, heh, there were moments. PMS week. Bad timing.
Sheila: we did not eat pizza. But the bagels? OMG TO DIE FOR!
Rich: awww, thanks. :cheese: It was so absolutely fantastic to meet you too. There will HAVE to be a repeat.
Robina: yeah, they know their architecture there.
DCup: so far, so good.
Undomestic Diva: um, about 6 hours away I believe. Is there a party I should know about?
blondefabulous: hand gestures are so helpful!!
Maman: hmmm… you know… I might have. I’ll have to look.
I DID however find out WHY that is. (NO ALLEYS!)
B.E. Earl: we did not do the Whispering Wall. I’ll have to add that to the growing list of “things I still have not done.. yet.”
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I totally took pictures of us meeting Dawg…and you guys listening to him talk in the Starbucks…I just didn’t post them yet cause they are at home and I am in Martha’s Vineyard….I promise though, I will put them on my Flickr page as soon as I get home…..on Sunday….
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Much better that way!
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You so made me miss being a NYer! I used to work near the Emprie state building…now Ir eally miss it!
I am glad everyone had a good time,
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…but the buildings are just so big and amazing!
:wha:
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Love the pictures! I miss that city… I was there in March 2002, on the 6 month anniversary of 9/11… A.M.A.Z.I.N.G.
Anyways, can’t wait to see more pictures!
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Oh, isn’t it absolutely wonderanimous? We went in 2005, and I was IN.LOVE.
Also, I TOTALLY get the building photos thing.
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Bagels…..YUM!!
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Glad you enjoyed your first trip to the Big Apple. So, what’s your next destination? And more importantly, does BlueJet fly there, because obviously they rock!
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You have great hair. Really, really great.
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I’m just going to be very jealous over here.
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Blah blah blah, I am so late in the day that I could be repeating a comment but blah blah blah, I get to do that since I’ve been sick.
The buildings are sort of the best part about NY so I am happy for you that you have so many pics! Yanno, not that you all aren’t cute as well but you catch my drift!
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Oh, honey! When you come up here (Last weekend in July? Check your calendar? Have your “twat” my people?) I’ll have to show you pictures from my NYC foray in 2003. Serious building pictures, babe. I’m right there which ya!
Love the post, sweetie! I felt the same way driving into the city in the back of a real-life New York cab! It’s amazing. Can’t wait for more!
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Oh, shit.
“Have your people ‘twat’ my people.”
Too much poo on the fingers to effectively type.
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I’m so glad you got to go. You obviously had a great time. I wanted to go SO badly but this house selling crap got in the way. Next time, for sure!
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It looks like you had a fab time. Great pics too. I’m jealous!
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Define street meat.
I’m scared.
Okay, go ahead. :help:
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Cissa Fireheart: can’t wait to see your pictures this weekend.
Finn: yep!
Christina: that would be so cool. If I ever got to do that, I don’t think I’d ever leave.
Talina: they really are.
Krystle: there are lots, lots more to come.
Sarcastic Mom: wonderanimous is EXACTLY the word I was looking for.
Sheila: oh they were. Soooo yum.
Employee No. 3699: LOL, I think my next trip is to Atlanta. In a car.
Pamela: awww, thanks.
Sarah: OK. I’ll send over snacks.
Hilly: I smell what you’re cookin’.
CMG: I will check my calendar as soon as I get home tonight! YAY!
Black Belt Mama: that house selling shit has. to. end. Soon.
Charlie Daniels (TBU): I did have a great time. It was everything I wanted it to be.
Stephanie: I’m pretty sure it’s chicken.
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Awesome! I know what you mean about feeling overwhelmed and wanting to cry. I also get that in Chicago.
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OMG! You bought shoes in Payless when there’s a Barneys?? Arrghhh. I’ll think about that all damn day.
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Hi, just found your blog and had to comment. The pictures totally remind me of my trip to NYC…I’m so jealous! I want to go back. I’m going to throw myself on the ground now and have a temper tantrum, excuse me :banghead:
All better.
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ok i’ve been reading for a while, and am now de-lurking because i HAD to comment on this…
you’ve taken a picture of my office!!!
the photo from 45th st.. the blackish glassy building on the left hand side of the picture… THATS MY GODDAMN OFFICE!
how exciting!
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Nan Patience: ohhh Chicago. I get an entirely different need to cry there. Chicago really is home for me.
Amy: it was a case of Love The One You’re Standing Right In Front Of. Promise!
Dirty Pirate Hooker: I love a good temper tantrum.
little_lj: DUDE! You could have had LUNCH with us!
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I know that cemetery photo was for me. Totally.
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I’m very happy to hear that you went and had a wonderful time.
Inspite of the Roaches!
~ZZ
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