I’ve decided Sunday will be Contest Day.
Of course, I decided this MONTHS ago and since then everyone and their fucking brother has been doing giveaways. DAMN YOU PEOPLE AND YOUR GENEROSITY!! You’re stealing my ju ju!!
(OK, I maybe thought of this like 8 days ago. But since then everyone and their fucking sister has been doing giveaways. DAMN YOU STILL!!)
Here is my problem:
It’s Sunday.
And I haven’t got the faintest fucking idea what to organize a contest around.
And? I haven’t got any prizes.
And? This is the second Sunday in a row I’ve found myself in such a predicament. Last Sunday I decided that I would just wait. No sense putting shit out there if it’s not a well thought out idea. Sometimes it is just best to hold off until you get the details in place. Last Sunday, I reminded myself that if you can’t do something right, you shouldn’t do it at all.
Fuck it.
Who wants some free stuff?
What do you want?
I have…
Here’s how you win…
In the comments, tell me which prize you want and why you deserve to win.
I will RANDOMLY select a winner, and they will win whichever prize they chose. (so you don’t have to be funny to win)
Contest is open until 12pm EST on Tuesday.
Multiple entries are allowed.
And…. GO!
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I deserve to win boobie pictures because you promised them to me after I signed over the title to my house, and that was six months ago.
February 16th, 2008 at 1:23 am
If you mean random boobie pictures instead of yours, I will stab you in the head.
With my penis.
February 16th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
I want a video post dedicated to me (and my awesomeness) because I know you secretly have a girl crush on me and you are dying to do just that.
Also? I am so awesome. (Not as awesome as Hilly or you, but still, quite awesome.)
Oh and? I’ll pay you. In boobie pictures. But only if you don’t show Avi. Ha ha.
Karen Sugarpants’s last blog post..Censored
February 17th, 2008 at 12:06 am
I want a video post dedicated to me (and my awesomeness)!
Why? Well, because I’m awesome that’s why! Really though, I have been a faithful reader of your blog for well over a year or has it been two? Time files when you’re having fun. I lived your highest highs with you, dancing with Prince, and your lowest lows, loosing a tampon comes to mind. Well, I guess that’s it. I wish I could come up something really profound and wonderful as to why I deserve to win. Saying, “Because I want to!” while stomping my feet won’t cut it, will it?
Janelle’s last blog post..Time to Share With the Class- don’t be shy…
February 17th, 2008 at 12:40 am
while posts regaling my awesomeness are always, well, awesome, I seriously need some amazon love.
Your 25 dollars will go towards my aerogarden. My long sought after, totally coveted and completely yet to be purchased for me even though I have begged for it using all manners of sexual favors, aerogarden. Yes, Britt, you can help sell me back out of whoredom and into fresh vegetables of my own growing.
You know you want to.
flutter’s last blog post..Therapy notes: fat fat faaaaaaat!
February 17th, 2008 at 1:20 am
I want a post about my awesomeness. Why? Because I am NOT feeling awesome and having a total innernet stranger telling me that I am awesome will cure my angst. Completely cure! Down with angst! Also-if your post about my awesomeness also qualifies in some way as one of the papers I have due in the next four weeks it will be double the awesome. AND! My cat’s name is Dude. As in “Duuuuuuude. You’re awesome!”
Sam’s last blog post..Brain Is Done
February 17th, 2008 at 2:37 am
I was going to have you do a post about my awesomeness, but I figure that’s going to be pretty damned hard seeings the only info you have on me is that I draw…
So I’ll go the iTunes certificate!
Dee’s last blog post..Like a Tiger *grrrrrrr*
February 17th, 2008 at 2:42 am
i would like the prize of your choise, although preferably the amazon gift cert or your special guacamole (ha! your special sauce!). and you should send me the prize because i have curly red hair. us curly haired folks ahve to stick together! oh, another reason is that since i met your blog i haven’t missed a post, even from mexico. i mean, it is 4:32 in the morning and the dogs had to pee, so i check my damn computer for new posts, for crying out loud.
ok, maybe my prize should be a gift certificate to my first visit with a shrink, but whatever. i’ll take a video post or ramblings here as to why i am a whack job, i mean awesome.
February 17th, 2008 at 4:34 am
oh, and that is CHOICE.
maybe i need a prize coz i can’t type? i just love to be a winner, that’s all. pick me, pick me!!
February 17th, 2008 at 4:36 am
Oh, oh!!!! The Amazon GC…totally. Because I’m trying to save up for a digital camera since mine sucks butt. But I’d be happy to see your boobies too.
BlondeBlogger’s last blog post..Score One for Mom!
February 17th, 2008 at 4:57 am
how wrong is it that i would prefer boobie pictures over that itunes certificate? of course i would use the itunes certificate and wouldn’t use boobie pics, but still…
February 17th, 2008 at 5:00 am
25$ amazon GC because I am new and have slowly been reading all your entries like a good little girl.
And can I suggest random boobie pics to avi just so we can see him stab you in the head..with his penis?
DaDuck’s last blog post..Sticky:Earth Hour
February 17th, 2008 at 5:13 am
I’d like the Amazon gift certificate. I deserve it SO MUCH because I’m old. Really old. And I’m a bargain biddy, so getting $25 in any form might be the highlight of my year.
Donna W’s last blog post..An awesome horse video
February 17th, 2008 at 7:00 am
boobie pics? *ears perked*
Of you??*one eyebrow raised*
turnbaby’s last blog post..TurnbabyTalks Trivia Throwdown
February 17th, 2008 at 7:30 am
Turnbaby, oh you so know she’ll just find some random pictures online of someone’s boobs. She’s trying to be all clever with semantics.
February 17th, 2008 at 8:29 am
I don’t want anything, except for you to be happy and healthy and for all your dreams to come true.
Okay, who is making those gagging sounds?
Mr. Fabulous’s last blog post..Tonight, straight outta Hell!
February 17th, 2008 at 8:43 am
I should win the video post dedicated to me because…
I’m new to blogging and I spent all Saturday reading yours and avitable’s and sugarpant’s and many others blogs in hopes one day I will fit into the circle. (And I stole a bunch of everyone’s ideas.)
mcat’s last blog post..Post VD Reflections
February 17th, 2008 at 9:25 am
I want either the guest post dedicated to my awesomeness or the video post (first choice, actually) about the same thing.
I deserve to win because
a.) unlike Fab, i did not shamelessly try to kiss your ass in a thinly veiled attempt to win
b.) I think that a ringing endorsement from someone as wonderful and awesome as YOU could only make me feel better about myself
c.) Your video posts make me all tingly inside
d.) I’ve got a new radio show coming up and could get you a spot on it, capiche? (LOL)
Hilly’s last blog post..Super Snoopy Snackie Sunday: Lovestoned
February 17th, 2008 at 10:11 am
I think I should win the post about my awesomeness because now you are in a picture with Prince AND that picture features your boobs.
turnbaby’s last blog post..TurnbabyTalks Trivia Throwdown
February 17th, 2008 at 10:32 am
I think I deserve to win a Amazon GC because I gave up for lent at your request and it is really really hard.
Topncal’s last blog post..Pictures of KittyNibbles and I
February 17th, 2008 at 10:38 am
The amazon gc would be my choice.
See, my Dad makes these walking canes out of palm tree berry stalks, and he is selling them on amazon. He hasn’t had a sale yet. I think if he sold one it would just make his day.
I could just see him taking so much time and care to mail it out to his first customer. Hell, I’d even have it sent to you, Miss Britt. (Just so he wouldn’t know it was his daughter doing it.) Plus, I already have one! So we would both win on this one.
February 17th, 2008 at 10:43 am
Ok I know this is not a democracy but tallyho bid seems like an awesome cause.
Topncal’s last blog post..Pictures of KittyNibbles and I
February 17th, 2008 at 10:45 am
I have spent the last four hours trying to decide what prize I want. $25 of amazon or iTunes vouchers is highly tempting. But then again boobies rank highly on my top ten list of favorite glands.
But I’m going to go with the guest post. Is it to be published here or over on the winners blog? Either way is good for me, but I was just wondering.
Dan’s last blog post..“It’s all Greek to Me” Sunday
February 17th, 2008 at 10:58 am
Wow, I can’t decide…
I know I don’t want an itunes gift card, I would never ever use that shit.
I’ve been meaning to download a bunch of music from Amazon.com, so a GC from there would be awesome.
But the guest post or video sounds cool too. And I am pretty awesome. You know I am. I know that you know that I know that you want to do a guest post and a guest video for the totally awesome Nobody™. I’ll leave it to you to decide which one.
And, of course, it goes without saying that I want the boobie pictures, cause I love me some boobies. And I do have that Masters of Boobie Inspection degree that I posted about a couple weeks back.
I hope I haven’t violated the rules by not being able to decide.
Nobody™’s last blog post..Nobody’s Home
February 17th, 2008 at 11:13 am
oh man, tallho needs to win the amazon prize. helping her dad feel better is a good cause.
can i remove myself from the amazon prize?
does this contest you are running have rules?
February 17th, 2008 at 11:22 am
I deserve the amazon gift certificate for most unique birthday present of the year…
The Absurdist’s last blog post..Penguin Dreams and Stranger Things IV
February 17th, 2008 at 11:47 am
Wow… let’s see. Hmmmm….
I would like a guest post. Then I could forward it to all my friends and demonsrtate to them how full of awesomeness strangers think I am. Because fundamentally I am insecure and could use that kind reassurance.
Please and thank you
Nat’s last blog post..Flakey Friday 5: I feel pretty
February 17th, 2008 at 11:54 am
I want the Amazon gift certificate, cuz I need to buy porn! They do sell porn at Amazon, right? I need it… badly… I think…
Maybe the Boobie Pics would help if I was a guy… or into boobies… but I’m not…
Just horny…
DutchBitch’s last blog post..Handle With Care
February 17th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
I’ll take a guest post, by you, on my blog, sometime the week of March 29-April 5 (I’m outta town then). Why?
Because you love me! :-)
Pretty lame, I know, but worth a try!
Coal Miner’s Granddaughter’s last blog post..I’m Feelin’ the Love Today!
February 17th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
The guest post would be lovely… Nobody ever tells me that I am awesome… I have teenage daughters. Currently, I am lower than slime at my house.
Maman’s last blog post..Hmmm, I am nicer than I thought!
February 17th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Just here to say again, “PICK ME!” (again) You said multiple entries are allowed :-)
Janelle’s last blog post..Does YOUR Name Come With A Price?
February 17th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
I should win because this is the first time I’m commenting here. I would like the $25 iTunes gift card so I could get some new music and get out of my current music-listening ruts!
Fluffy Cat’s last blog post..Proust, The Love-Killer
February 17th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
Boy, did I ever come home on the right weekend to catch up on journals! Haha! :)
I would like the Video Post, but on your blog. Or the written post, but also on your blog. Mine is not nearly popular enough and that would just kind of defeat the purpose, wouldn’t it? If I was the only one to ever read it??
As for why I “deserve” to win… uhm… I probably don’t. I’ve been terrible lately about keeping up on everyone’s blogs, commenting, and so on (through a string of mishaps, some my fault, some not). BUT! I do have an undying loyalty to you and your blog and catch up on it the first few minutes I get! And I’ve given you my cell phone number… something only a select few have been given just because I admire you so greatly and wanna be just like you when I grow up.
So there.
I don’t deserve it… and nothing I could write could compare to some of the funny ass comments in this section.
But I thought it was worth a try :).
Amber’s last blog post..My Family and Friends: The Attention Whores!
February 17th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
Ok, I’m entering your contest but I don’t have anything I can use itunes for, I’m not very awesome so you’d be hard pressed to come up with a video or post about me and I have my own boobies I can see whenever I want, which is never so that leaves the Amazon certificate.Thank goodness I don’t have to be funny to win.
February 17th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
I think I deserve the video post directed at me because not only am I amazingly intelligent and hilariously young, I’m gorgeous and you hearts me so much.
I am also going to have your baby. So you owe me…
Sarcastica’s last blog post..Drunken Escapades
February 17th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
Hmmmm…
Amazon Gift cert? Don’t really need anything.
Guest post, always fun.
Have as many tunes as this lo-tech gal needs.
Video post, low tech, remember.
No offense to you and your fabulous boobs, but I have a pretty darn nifty pair myself.
Have fun choosing a winner, looks like you have many takers. Such the generous soul that you are, Brittski.
Wicked H’s last blog post..Anatomy of an Idiot
February 17th, 2008 at 5:11 pm
Amy’s last blog post..You Can’t Make This Up!
February 17th, 2008 at 5:22 pm
I have to go with the boobies, why because…. well no because I just have to an if Avitable is right an they arent your’s well Im not fussy (Im not a pervert Im just male) but Im sure yours are ace
OK seriously I would actually like the Itunes Gift certificate as I lurrrve Itunes, but I really think tallyho should win so she can buy you one of her dad’s walking canes and make his day.
Tell any one I was bein selfless and I’ll deny it or consult a hitman
February 17th, 2008 at 6:07 pm
Ooo, the guest post devoted to my awesomeness because: a) my blog needs all the help it can get;
b) I am awesome but am English so can’t just put it out there; c) you rock in ways that cannot be quantified; and d) I’m English… did I mention that…?
Bec’s last blog post..Cat’s can blog too
February 17th, 2008 at 6:32 pm
I don’t like to win. :(
But I wanted to let you know I like the idea! :)
February 17th, 2008 at 9:10 pm
Just here again to say, PICK ME!! PICK MEEEEE!!!
Janelle’s last blog post..Dear God, do I get a gold star for being a better Christian?
February 17th, 2008 at 10:02 pm
so when do you announce the winners?
coz i wanna win.
pick me, pick me!!
February 17th, 2008 at 10:03 pm
I deserve to win because I invited you to PRINCE. WITH ME. That alone makes me a winner, for trying anyhow. Damn you and having to find a house–and succeeding.
I would like a guest post. Because, really, you on my blog would really spice things up.
themuttprincess’s last blog post..Made it through NASCAR.
February 17th, 2008 at 10:28 pm
You mean I can’t have them all?
Hmmm…iTunes then.
Why? Because I don’t usually win anything, and I can’t even buy new music right now. That’s how pathetic I am.
Finn’s last blog post..Friday Freewrite Four
February 17th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
I’ll enter the one for pics of avitable’s boobs.
No, that wasn’t correct, I want the $25 iTunes certificate, cause I just got a MacBook pro and transferred over my old tunes and need some new ones!
February 17th, 2008 at 11:15 pm
iTunes gift certificate! Because I’ve wanted to do a contest again for a while and I’m too lazy and I promise not to steal your “World’s Worst Contest” idea.
Not much of a reason, admittedly. But, like you said, not much of a contest, either. ;-)
kapgar’s last blog post..Avec moi, c’est soi…
February 18th, 2008 at 8:12 am
This is fun! I think that I would like a surprise post……I kind of did a tribute post for you about a few of our fun moments, I wasnt to see what you recollect!
Love ya!
Kristin’s last blog post..Double Standards vol. 2
February 18th, 2008 at 8:14 am
I would like the itunes certificate. Why? Because I promise to NEVER AGAIN enter a contest in which I stand a chance of beating you. Good deal or what?
*You won’t let me win will you?
metalmom’s last blog post..Monday Movie Mania with Metalmom
February 18th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
This entry was by email….
“You have pictures of boobies, really??? I’m not naive enough to think that
these would even possibly be pictures of yours but what the hell. . . I want
to win because it’s frickin cold in Iowa and I need something to warm me up.
If you know anythign about me then you know that these would do just fine. I
hope you are enjoying Florida and all that it has to offer. Now send me
pictures of boobies. Nobody, and I mean nobody likes them more than I do.”
hahahahahahaha - consider yourself entered. ;-)
February 18th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
^^^^ WRONG
Nobody™ DOES like boobies more than the prior entrant.
Nobody™’s last blog post..Random Find: Idiot
February 18th, 2008 at 5:58 pm
I want a video post from you and Avitable to me, because I have a really boring life and you guys seem to be having all the fun! Okay, maybe just because it seems like fun. Actually, I would be happy with any of the prizes except the booby pics (I have my own set, thanks).
Pick me, please. Pick me!
J.
HoosierGirl’s last blog post..Wii Survived!
February 18th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
Video post. Preferably featuring boobies.
Jenny, Bloggess’s last blog post..Speakerphone is sometimes a bad idea
February 18th, 2008 at 7:29 pm
6 Reasons Y2K should win pics of Miss Britt’s Boobies (accept no substitute)
1. YOu don’t really know me
2. You don’t read my blog
3. Nobody reads my blog
4. You don’t really like me
5. This is a real lame list
6. You know based on the reasons listed above, sending me pics of Miss Britt’s boobies will REALLY pissed off Avitable
February 18th, 2008 at 8:07 pm
Ooh, I’d like a video post of you telling everyone why you love me. This would be a great opportunity for you to read over my blog, get to know me, become infatuated with me, then stand outside my bathroom window so you can listen to me shower. You know, this is our courtship phase. Or something.
Or hey, a nice blog post would be great, too.
(I’m counting on Avi to get me shots of your boobies.)
Karl’s last blog post..Dammit Jim, I’m a Car, Not a Belly Dancer!
February 19th, 2008 at 12:12 am
My kid wants to win the itunes gift certificate because his mom is mean and never gives him any.
DeannaBanana’s last blog post..Are You My Type?
February 19th, 2008 at 7:24 am
I would like the “$25 Amazon Gift Certificate”.
Why? So I can buy you something nice and send it to you.
February 19th, 2008 at 10:40 am
CONTEST OVER!! MANINTHEKITCHEN WINS AUTOMATICALLY!!!
Ok.. I kid… I kid…
Kind of.
February 19th, 2008 at 10:47 am
Um… I want to win. I wanted the Amazon GC, but I agree that helping what’s-her-name with buying stuff from her dad is important. I did the same thing when my dad was selling stuff on Amazon. So, instead I want to try to convince you of a different prize… How about you make my blog pretty??? I’ll even buy a domain name so you have no restrictions on perameters, and such.
And I guess, if that’s a no, I’d like the guest post on my awesomeness. It should be pretty easy since there’s so much awesomeness to talk about. :-)
February 19th, 2008 at 11:14 am
Oooo, I would love a guest post. I totally don’t deserve it, but it would make me feel all warm and fuzzy.
February 19th, 2008 at 11:43 am
I want the iTunes gift card. I deserve it because I have a lot in common with you and we RAWK!
Shelli’s last blog post..Holy Crap! or Who The Hell Was That Girl?
February 19th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
I want the Amazon gift card and I deserve to win it because of the fact that we have a lot in common and we RAWK!
Shelli’s last blog post..Holy Crap! or Who The Hell Was That Girl?
February 19th, 2008 at 12:26 pm
It’s tuesday and it’s 1pm. (1:19pm, actually) do we get to find out the results of the contest??
February 19th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
oh my fuck DUH
I was thinking MIDNIGHT
Ummm…. heh… yes, CONTEST IS CLOSED!!
AM OFF TO RANDOMIZE AND WILL ANNOUNCE THE WINNER TOMORROW!!!
February 19th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
The internet was created so that we could have quick and easy access to boobie pictures.
So, I’m gonna go with that.
Winnah, winnah, chicken dinnah!!!
B.E. Earl’s last blog post..Black Metal Dreams
February 19th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Oops…too late! :)
B.E. Earl’s last blog post..Black Metal Dreams
February 19th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
I won, I just know it, I won.
Just waiting now for the confirmation…
February 19th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
I want guest post or video dedicated to my awesomeness.
I think you should pick me because of the challenge this would pose to your skill set. You would come out the other end an extremely polished bs’er. :)
whall’s last blog post..I’m not here at the moment, please leave a message…
February 19th, 2008 at 7:01 pm