I am always surprised by hatred.
Anger, I get. Rage, I understand intimately.
But that personal hatred, that vile that some people carry around inside of them, it always catches me off guard. Specifically when I find myself the target of it.
My husband says I’m one of those people you either love or hate. No in between. I asked him again tonight what he meant by that, why it is easier to hate some people than others. He attempted to explain that I have “one of those personalities”. In an effort to explain why a “strong personality” would so easily incite hate, he noted that I “am who I am,” and that I “don’t change that – for anyone. Babe, some people aren’t going to be able to handle that well.”
He’s told me that before. My grandfather tried to explain this to me when I was very, very young. Looking back, I realize he was trying in vain to prepare me.
But still, it surprises me. Every time.
The first time I remember being overwhelmed by hatred was in highschool. I remember walking through the halls and holding back tears as a mob of girls proudly displayed their “We Hate Britt” pins. God that was agonizing. As a 16 year old girl I was devastated that I could inspire so much hatred in people. I felt helpless, unable to recall any specific thing I’d done that could have caused such disdain.
Those girls moved on to something else, and I grew up. I brushed away my tears and pushed through the rest of highschool, determined to hold on to who I was. As if there were any other options.
As I’ve gotten older, the hatred has come less frequently. Mainly I suppose because you get to choose who you surround yourself with more and more the older we get. Sure, living in a small town I occasionally had to hear about this person’s issue with me and that person’s inability to “handle” me. But aside from the infrequent misplaced gossip, I could basically go on about my merry way.
And then I moved, and encountered a whole new group of people who had never been exposed to me before.
*sigh*
Apparently there is a very grown man that remembers me from a party, whom I wouldn’t recognize if he bit me in the ass (except of course, to ask him why he’d bit me in the ass), who spends quite a bit of time hating me. Like, openly, verbally, hating me.
It seems I’m one of those people that it’s not only easy to hate, but acceptable to loathe. Yeah, that part still gets me.
And then, there is blogging.
I’ve been thinking again today about why I blog, trying to sort out what matters and what doesn’t – what’s worth responding to and what needs to be ignored.
Am I blogging to Win Friends And Influence People?
I don’t think that’s exactly it. I’m certainly not looking to be Internet Prom Queen.
The truth is, when I sit down to write here, I usually think about what I have to say that might be worth hearing. What needs to be shared? Whether it’s laughter or heartache – what are the things that are spinning around inside me that for one reason or another have. to. get. out?
I always forget that it might incite the hate.
I mean, sure, I expect some dissenting comments here and there when it comes to sports or politics or religion. Or hair styles (because good LORD you people are passionate about hair). I’ve come to expect that if I mention any type of parenting detail here, there is going to be Internet Advice coming through in waves.
But the hatred still surprises me.
It never occurs to me when I post pictures of my kids that someone would get venomous about it. It never crossed my mind when I exposed the Internet to my husband that someone would attack him. I always forget when I put myself out here, that it leaves you open for all types of feedback – good, bad, and otherwise. And that the more personal the exposure, the more personal that “feedback” can feel.
It’s insanely naive, I know. Naive because people are what they are; insane because it’s a lesson I’ve learned a million times in the last 28 years.
But still, I’m caught off guard. I’m often left between shaking with rage at the wrongness of it and sick to my stomach at how hard it still is, even at my age, to be so disliked. I have to hold off the urge to fight back – and often fail miserably, managing to twist in a dig here and there in a ridiculous effort to say something in my own defense.
I’m not a puppies and hearts and rainbows girl. At all. I can flip shit and make jokes that hit below the belt as quickly as the next person, if not more quickly. I know that we won’t all sit around singing campfire songs with our arms around one another. I don’t expect the entire world to fall over themselves to tell me how much they love me.
But still, the hatred… surprises me.
And I wonder why it doesn’t surprise everyone else.
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Most hate is borne out of jealousy. Someone sees you, looks at their pitiful existence, and just wishes they could have half of the exuberance, ambition, intelligence, and ability that you do. So then they hate you because of who you are and because they have a dozen cats and can’t leave the house without knocking down a wall in their welfare apartment and being driven away on the bed of a flatbed truck.
And some people hate you because you run up and punch them in the nuts every morning when you come to work.
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Look, I like you, I like you a lot. Which is why I think you should TOTALLY send me a video of this crotch punching I keep hearing about. I think… just maybe… it might make me like you even more.
:heartbeat: :heartbeat:
On the other thing? My parents always told me to consider the source and since Avi was kind enough to really describe said source we all know what we are dealing with.
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It surprised me too over the years, sugar. You really are a sweetheart – a vibrant, fun-loving, good true friend and someone looking from the outside (especially the sick and twisted filthy disgusting pig headed know it all know nothing judgmental type of people who spend more time bitching than say, cleaning their disgusting apartment – ahem)just don’t know jack shit.
All that cat hair isn’t allowing enough oxygen to it’s brain and the waft of kitty litter box
is smothering what’s left of it’s shriveled up heart.
I know we’ve talked about this already, but please know that even those who are keeping this enemy close, see right through the toxicity and for some reason (drama-loving heathens) they kiss it’s ass and prop it up based on it’s own screaming of self love which hello? Is only a transparent facade of someone who is so far out of touch with reality, it’s spewings of b.s. and hatred only remind me of one thing.
Jabba the Fucking Hut.
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It’s the same people who write in to complain about a TV show rather than turn the channel. You can’t like everyone all the time, so if you don’t, just go somewhere else: hate is such a ridiculous emotion when it’s not for something truly deserved .
I like you
And we all know that my opinion is the one that really matters! :poke:
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:lmfao: @ Karen!
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What does surprise me is why some people insist on hanging on to hate and putting it in practise so much. It’s such a negative energy and it actually saddens me that it occupies some peoples minds so much. If you hate something that much, cut it out of your life, don’t go there, don’t comment, just leave it and be done with it… I mean, of course anyone is entitled to their opinion and voicing it, but these endless tirades and making eachothers life hell… I can’t understand it.
I know what it feels like though. I have the kind of personality that people either love or hate too. Well, if people don’t like me or don’t like my opinion or what I have to say, fine… They don’t HAVE to like me. I am who I am and people can take me for who I am or leave me in peace. I am not stalking them for not agreeing with me either…
That’s my 2 cents…
But I :heartbeat: you!
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Totally read “Internet Porn Queen”….
Yeah that woke me right the hell up. :coffee:
There are always assholes, honey and you have way more friends than assholes. (Just one – right?)
That being said, I totally have your back. I may not be all 28 and shit but I still have it.
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I’ve had a two situations where bloggers/commenters decided to take a line they disagreed with and extend it to a full-on, vitriolic and personal attack on me in general… completely outside of the original “offense.”
However, one of the blessings of being raised by a sociopath is that most folks fury feels, well, amateurish. So it’s a strange plus, I guess.
The thing is, people react differently – read: with more anger, less civility – on the internet. This is a vetted fact. People have better manners in person.
Or, often: some schmuck who’s NEVER going to get to approach you in person is going to unload their lack of self-worth on you simply because you’re Britt and they’re not.
Either way, I’d say it doesn’t matter too much in the end. You rock, and I certainly hope that you KNOW you rock.
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Hate has a distinct physiology. And knowing this is a great power.
So whenever I stumble upon someone who doesn’t like me – especially when I have no idea why they feel that way – I always go out of my way to get them to have a very active hate towards me. And if I have to do something irritating to them to make sure that hatred runs deep, I’m there doing it.
Then they walk away with this blinding, unreasoning hate that I put in them. Hate gives you an irregular heartbeat, turns your liver black, kills nerve endings, gives you chronic headaches, ruins your blood pressure, rips your stomach lining and puts dark bags under your eyes. It makes you sick, mean, irritable, and breaks down your libido. It consumes you from within until your lungs disintegrate and are coughed up on your shirt in a hard black bile every time you speak.
Yes. When I find someone who doesn’t like me, or wishes me ill, I go out of my way to make sure they hate me so that, soon, they are reduced to a seething wretch on the verge of shriveling up and blowing away like a corn husk at any minute. Or at least take 10 years off their life and die sooner so they can’t muck up the gene pool any further.
Yeah, that’s what I always say…
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have you read The Four Agreements? if not, you must hurry out today and purchase it. please just trust me on this. when you get it, turn to the chapter regarding taking nothing personally. read it once, read it again. really think about what you’re reading too because i’m telling you, that chapter in that one book totally opened my eyes. i know what you’re going through.
when someone says something to characterize you, remember that it is always filtered through the crap in his or her own head. by the time it even gets out of his mouth, it isn’t even about you anymore—it most resembles HIM. in other words, all that’s wrong in HIM. think of his words as a testament to his own dysfunction, and don’t internalize it in the least. you can’t, because you’ll meet this person in one form or another for the rest of your life, and so you have to learn the truth about them.
in order for his words (or beliefs about you) truly affect you, you must somehow agree with them. you have to agree on some level with the lie he has said against you. but if you DON’T make that agreement, this man has no power over you, and only spins his wheels. that’s his cross to bear, living that kind of life. it must be a sad existence, hating for no reason at all. imagine his interior narrative or life!
hatred is everywhere, britt. negativism, anger, frustration, it’s all around us all the time. it stands to reason that once in awhile you will meet someone who can’t navigate out of that dark energy, and this sad guy is an example of that. you will meet many more like him unfortunately, and it’s because you are who you are. which is to say a meaningful person with a good and genuine spirit, with a certain kind of light.
this attracts all types, hon, even the bad ones.
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You know I just posted about Internet drama last week and it was in reference to some of the crap I’ve been seeing lately. I know my day is coming. There’s going to be someone who going to hate something I say or be vicious. It’s a shame that some people thrive on drama and being mean.
You just have to let it roll…
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oh and for the record? the Britt that writes these types of posts is a Britt i truly like. you don’t need to be funny for me—i’m just grateful that you’re honest.
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I just re-read my comment and those after it and wanted to clarify that I don’t hate this person that is causing you to feel this way. I pity her. I’m with Rich – I was raised by worse.
It pisses me off that you’re hurting over this though.
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I found your blog by accident and since I did I’ve become quite addicted to it. You put everything you feel ‘out there’ for us to read and think about. I think you’re very brave for saying some of the stuff you do. I like you because you’re YOU. There is no room in this world for hatred. We can choose not to like someone and that’s cool. But if someone is really set against hurting you…it’s because they’re hurting themself and need someone to ‘deflect’ that pain on.
Easier said than done…but ignore them. You’ve got two beautiful children that need your attention more than that fool does!!
We :heartbeat: :heartbeat: you Miss Britt!!!
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I always pictured you as being one of the most popular girls in high school. Was I wrong??
I don’t see how anyone could hate you. You seem like the type of person that loves to have fun and joke around. I think Avi hit the nail on the head. You gotta stop punching guys in the balls, we hate that :lmfao:
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Dayum I only have two seconds and sooooo much to say on this.
I’m 48 sugar and it still surprises me when someone I don’t know and who doesn’t know me says they ‘hate’ me. But it doesn’t cause me consternation–it makes me laugh.
back to tell you why in a bit
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I don’t like using the word hate, although I use it more than I should. My mom would always tell me not to say I hate someone because that means I want to kill that person.
Looking back on my life, especially in the last couple of years, I have said and done things that have made people dislike me. The actions weren’t intentional but nevertheless, it was my mistakes that caused problems.
I think everyone (in the world) needs to stop and take a look once in a while to reflect on any actions that may have caused turmoil in someone else’s life. We all make mistakes by saying or do something, but it’s the realization of those actions and what we do about them that will hopefully bring peace and harmony back into our lives at the end.
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Okay…I was a little behind on this when I read Amy’s post, but now I am up to speed.
Don’t let the bastards get you down.
I’ll just say this. Look at this way. I dislike a lot of people and definitely do not suffer fools gladly. Adam is a perennial top ten candidate for misanthrope of the year, Mrs. Fab has no use for practically anyone, and T-Dawg hardly ever likes anyone she meets right off the bat.
But…we all adore you to death. That ought to tell you something. :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat:
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I read your blog, Amy’s blog and Avi’s blog. I can’t see why anyone in their right mind would hate any one of you! Avi’s wasn’t about people hating him today…..but I still don’t understand why….I love all three of you…and Im just a loyal lurker
:heartbeat: :heartbeat:
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If it makes it any easier Britt… I’d do ya! And I wouldn’t even hate myself afterwards. In spite of your unreasonable ill feelings towards Eli.
I agree with Adam that your High School thing was based on jealousy but the Internet thing is a little more strange. So many people are so afraid to live life they can only seem to live via others. They thrive in the realm of the ingorant (I think Adam calls them Sheeple) and express instant hatred of larger than life characters like Hillary, Britany, and Paris. Of which I am somehow happy when I learn that 2 out of 3 are willing to not wear panties. (Please God let it ONLY be 2 out of the 3)
So I guess what I am saying is, “To hell with what everybody else thinks! Britt you should really consider walking around without panties and “doing” me.
WARNING!! Following Cris’s advise often leads to people hating themselves.
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Hey you know, Britt, Fabby made a gint. There’s a lot of people we don’t like either. The difference is that we go “Meh…we don’t like them…oooh…shiny…” and move immediately on to something else.
Maybe a very short attention span is the reason we’re all looking for here.
:angel:
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It takes one hell of a coward to sit behind a screen and make personal attacks on people that they do not even know over the fact that they disagree with your opinions. These cowards have nothing better to do with their time than try to make themselves feel better about their own lives by trying to make the lives of others look bad.
On the other hand, it takes one hell of a brave person to continue putting these opinions out there, knowing that they are risking such personal attacks. These people have strong morals, values, and opinions, and will not be silenced by the idle threats or attacks of someone that they don’t know.
While the personal attacks may hurt, please take comfort in knowing that you don’t have to harbor the feelings of hate and displeasure with everyone and every situation that disagrees with you. It really must suck for her that she is so unhappy that she has to attack others to make herself feel better.
You’ve taken the “high road”, my dear. That in itself speaks louder than anything that can be written. :heartbeat: :heartbeat:
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avitable: you know you like it. I can tell by how flushed you get afterwards and those noises you make. I’m pretty sure those are squeals of ecstasy.
AmyD: my lawyer has advised me against videos of any alleged crotch punching.
Karen: there are some real gems in there. LOL
Dee: I’ve always admired the follow through of those letter writing people. I mean, seriously, I don’t write my grandma letters!
DutchBitch: now that’s one thing I NEED to get better at – just staying away.
Kimberly: this 28 thing is really screwing with you isn’t it? LOL
I have crows feet Kimberly!! I swear I do!!
Rich: I do, I do.
RW: this.. um… surprises me from you. And there is no way I have that kind of attention span.
Crys: just ordered it, should be here Friday. Thank you, as always.
Lisa: you of all people have a better perspective than most on how to let the non important shit roll.
Crys: wait.. um… you still like me when I’m funny too, right? I am funny! I’m totally funny!!!
Karen: you’re too cool for hate.
Rachel: aw, thank you. And hi! :wave:
Nobody™: nope, not that girl. I mean, I was relatively normal I think – cheerleader, boyfriends, blah blah blah – but definitely not The Popular Girl.
Dude, I have a lazy eye. That disqualifies me right there. LOL
Turnbaby: I’ll wait with bated breath.
Jen: your mom sounds pretty smart.
Mr. Fab: that I am a horrible judge of character?
Seriously – you all seem so friendly to me!!
(and :heartbeat:)
Just Me: well, um, I can be kind of a nasty bitch. I will say that.
Y2k: Oh my God. Best comment ever. I’m dying here. LOL
Mom: that’s a good point. Although, I don’t know what a gint is.
Angel: no, I’m sure the high road would be completely ignoring it, not even knowing it existed.
But I’m hopeful I’ll find that road someday anyway.
Thanks, love.
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Well, maybe. If you think so. But mainly I think the Hatred Bunch should stay away…
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P.S. The hatred surprises me as well. On the other hand, I realize that no matter what we do or say, we cannot please everyone. In not being able to please everyone, there will be some displeased people who are unable to control themselves and act in a civilized manner. These people will attack every little thing that we do, when they really should be ignoring us if they disagree so strongly that they feel the need to attack us.
Life is to short to waste your time on these people (I know who you are talking about, but am not naming names). These people thrive on the responses of the victims of their attacks. They do not realize that it is foolish and extremely petty to attack the character of someone that they do not even know. They are the ones losing out.
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I still think you have taken the high road. You did ignore it, up until this point. When you finally decided that it was time to speak your mind on the issue, you did so in an intelligent manner, choosing not to attack the person that attacked you.
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Can’t we all??? But you are still great!
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As usual, I have no clue what’s going on.
But I agree with Avi … it’s usually born out of jealousy.
I remember many days that my daughter came home crying from school because her little group had turned on her. I kept drilling it into her head that they were all just jealous of a happy, NICE, and VERY cute girl. Heh.
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I truly hope I have never made a comment that has left you feeling that way. If I have I am sorry. I adore you. :heartbeat:
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Crys said what I was going to say about not taking anything personally. I have post on my blog about The Four Agreements. Go read it; then you won’t have to buy the book! :secret:
I’ve only been visiting here for awhile, but you seem like the kind of woman that I’d bond with immediately. If I lived in Orlando, I’d be friend-stalking you.
The problem with you is that you are not boring. You are not milquetoast, you are not halfway. And that is threatening to some people.
Plus you hate IKEA. And, apparently, IKEA is God. Or something.
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Had to mention that I loved Crystal’s response!
You and your friends and family know who and what you are about, Britt.
Of course, it’s easier said than done, but save your energy and leave the nasty person to dwell alone in their pool of unhappiness.
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Wow, thank you, Avi!
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Some people are so insecure the only way they can feel “adult” or in control is by picking on other people. The internet has given these people an outlet for their spewings and rampage. (actually, he is probably pissed off because you don’t remember him. ego and stuff)
I love your postings, I would love to meet you. I think you are a wonderful person, mother, wife.
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I’ve been the brunt of that same unwarranted loathing before and no matter how much I tell you to ignore it, I know that it is so hard to do. Like I said yesterday, one of the only things that gets me through is knowing that it really is all about the other person and their hatred for themselves.
How miserable does someone have to be to take time out of the precious life that they have been given to spend so much of it on hateful energy towards someone else? Every person that does this is pathetic and sad in some way. Sure, if one of the were to read this, they would balk and get defensive, saying that it is not true but really? How insecure does one have to be to keep picking and prodding at someone else rather than worry about and fix their own lives. Oh wait, because I can hear the term “my life needs no fixing, bitch” coming out then let’s call it “enhancing their lives” because we all can do that, right?
Anyway, as you can tell, I have dealt with the internet hatred a LOT back in the day. I walked away from participating after an epiphany like you are having now. No matter what anyone says, it hurts and is confusing. I am so sorry you have to go through any of it, whether it be real life or the Wide Wide World of Web.
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I kinda understand what you mean. I usually don’t like many people and that doesn’t bother me. However, someone not liking me for whatever the reason always gets to me…. Not enough to make me cry anymore, but enough to sting and me to start thinking there is something wrong with ME. And, as much as there probably is, I am not going to change for someone else.
I like you. SO that should count for something.
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I’ll never forget some girl in high school saying “I always hated you until I got to know you.” Sometimes people don’t know you well enough to know why they don’t like you but given the chance they change their tune.
Screw the haters – they are miserable people and have to live with themselves. We love you! :love:
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Fuck everyone else. We love you and that’s what matters. Friends and family. The rest can’t even kiss your ass-they’re not worthy. :kiss:
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You were nominated for a RFS Blog Award! Yay you!
Go vote!
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I don’t know what your mom meant by I made a gint, but I am going to assume that she is totally coming on to me.
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Excellent post! After reading everyone’s fantastic comments, I don’t think there is anything more I could add.
You continually put yourself out there and unfortunately, some people will use that against you. I agree, something has to be missing in the hater’s life. I also don’t buy their theory that the person they hate doesn’t affect them one bit. If that were true, why do they keep rehashing it over and over (you know who I’m talking about). I’m betting you have a trait they admire and it just pisses them the hell off! :pissed:
Keep on doing what you’re doing. All the people that love and admire you know what they’re talking about!
hgreatone:
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i’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, particularly as it relates to blogging. i just don’t get the hate either. it feels like a really big waste of energy in the wrong direction to put that out in the world, doesn’t it?
i wouldn’t mind a little kumbaya! damn it!
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Ok, so I guess I missed something. Which is weird cause I’m here everyday. Then again, it’s not that weird, cause I ALWAYS seem to miss these things.
Anyway, it’s easy to tell people to ignore the haters and the morons, but it’s not that easy to actually do it. I’ve received my fair share of hate mail and some nasty comments, like that day I got called a “pig” by somebody. I just laugh at them when they do that. But it still sucks.
So if you want, I’ll totally go with Mr. Fab to deliver a beat down on anyone that you think needs it. Just let me know. I’ll get out the Sopranos Special wooden baseball bat even.
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DutchBitch: yeah, I know.
Angel: you are so zen and serene. I need me some of that.
Just Me: well thank you. :blush:
J.: hm, that surprise me.
debkitty: OMG No!!!! Not in a million years.
And I try really hard not to hold against you your love for that team from your state.
Finn: well I just ordered it, but I’m planning to make it by your way ASAP just the same.
Marney: I do certainly have plenty of other things I could use that energy on…
jflins: are you also anti-crotch punching?
Trishk: how is it again that we haven’t met yet? You live in my state! (or I in yours, I suppose)
Hilly: yes, on all accounts. Except I am baffled that anyone could hate you.
themuttprincess: I like you too, so that counts for a lot, actually.
MB: oddly enough, I remember someone telling me that exact same thing. LOL
metalmom: my ass is pretty heavily guarded. :heartbeat:
Christie: yeah, I know, that’s going to cost Adam another crotch punch too.
Mr. Fab: you are pretty irresistible.
Jeannie: I know – what gets me is why I still let it bother me. I mean seriously, wtf?! I should know better.
sizzle: Kumbaya doesn’t get enough air time, in my opinion.
Jay: oh it’s good you missed it. And it’s mainly because I refuse to link to it – although pussy ass posts like these probably aren’t any better.
And yeah, it is easier said than done. I tiny part of me kind of likes the idea of a bat. shhhh
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There are so many unhappy people in this world and when one of them encounters someone as full of life as you, they realize how sad their miserable little lives are …
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You are doing the best thing you can do. Talk about it. Discuss it. If there could just be more conversation in our world so many things would be different, better.
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OK, I’m with Avitable. It’s jealousy, but I also think it’s clashing personalities and people who are just born to hate. The clashing personalities thing I’ve had experience with. See, magnets of same charge repel one another and I think sometimes that personalities are like that, too. The solution is get far away from that person so that you don’t clash. Some people just can’t do that and can’t let go.
Also, there are those that probably just hate because they don’t know what else to do with their time. They suffer from paraphilia, an addiction to hatred that, for some, gives them a sexual release. Seriously.
Then, the jealousy. They’re just jealous.
And whatever category these nutjobs fall into. Fuck ‘em. Delete that message/comment and don’t give it another thought because they’re not worth the time.
:heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat: :heartbeat:
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You know, I don’t think there is a single comment here that I disagree with. Although… OMG, between Karen and RW I’m still cackling! Hee hee.
On one hand, I agree that you shouldn’t pay any attention to it, we’ve talked about that. But, gee, look how good I am at that. :lmao:
On the other hand, how do you “kill” the darkness? You shine a light on it. Just like you are now. Somebody mentioned – get it out there, talk about it, discuss it. And, I think that is an excellent point. And, the way you did it here could not have been more reasonable, rational, and honest.
:angel:
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LOL @ Karen and RW too
The short answer for why I laugh at them? Because they are expending energy and time and thought and poisoning themselves over something they can’t control….Me and how I live my life.
I won’t try to please them, I can’t control what they think or say and I don’t give a rat’s ass what they think about me.
I can only control me….what I think about me and how I choose to express it.
That being said I’ll take on anyone who lies about and is hateful/hurtful toward a friend.
You’ve inspired a post I think.
And of course I
:heartbeat: you!
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I recently experienced extreme hate from my “family”, so much so that I have decided that my family and myself don’t need that in our lives anymore. They are so confused, why are we mad at them?
Anyway people are going to do what they are going to do, you can’t control them, just like they can’t control you unless you let them.
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I don’t know what the heck is going on that inspired this post but I’m just gonna ditto everyone else about how much this person sucks and how fantastic you are.
I’ve been called a “strong woman” many times in my life…I just found out recently that it was a polite way of calling me a bitch. And I’m okay with that. I’ve been told many times that people can’t just “like” me. They either love me or hate me. It’s just something about me.
Anyway, after rambling I’ll close with this :
You’ve got a middle finger for a reason. Use it and forget whoever the hell is causing all this turmoil.
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Some people are just miserable bastards, no matter what you do.
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You. Brilliant. Fabulous. Godlike.
Them. Fuckers.
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:clap:
I think it does too!!!
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Hey Britt. I am new, and don’t know all the dynamics/friendships/trolls that are a part of this blog family, but I soooo agree with the jealously comments. We have to sometimes remove the toxic relationships/people from our lives. And don’t feed the trolls….some people get off on hurting others…and they prey on those who have tender hearts, and those they think they can emotionally destroy.
Fuck ‘em if they can’t take a joke.
I think you rock. :rock:
Signed,
A Pro-Crotch Punching Fan, Stephanie
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I really think some people are crazily invested in their online image, but in the worst kind of way. You are the opposite of that, thank God.
That is, you’re a real person, not a manufactured image. Again, thank God.
I think these other people consider trashing people for laughs or for some kind of mob effect to be entertainment. Maybe it is to people who go for that kind of thing, but I don’t. I just think it’s…boring. And tasteless. And frankly, beneath me. I wish they felt the same about themselves.
I also wonder about these people IRL. I mean, how unfortunate their actual existence most probably is, given the level of vitriol they spew. Are they unseen by their IRL peers? Are they basically socially incompetent? Are they painfully shy, resentful, mentally fucked up, or just missing some sort of essential human component?
Whatever the answer, I’m just glad I’m not them.
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They don’t get girls like us, britt. That’s what it is, pure and simple. We have “lay it all out there” personalities and that scares the shit out of a lot of people. Jealousy. That’s where it stems from.
You are a beautiful woman, inside and out. I knew that the moment I laid eyes on your mouthy, loud ass.
I adore you. Fuck everyone else.
CP.
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I’d vote you in as IPQ any day of the week. Fuck the haters! Lemme at ‘em. :whosnext:
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Stoopid unpopulated form. That last one was me…
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Okay, tell us who hates you and we will all pick on him and hurt him till he squeals. :violent006:
You are far too nice and sweet a girl for ANYONE to hate.
J.
And by the way, I was the same way about posting my kids’ pics and such, until someone mean tried to use them against me. Sadly, now I am more cautious.
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Can’t we all just get along?
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Ms. Britt,
Concerning the “hatred” thing, could it be how you conduct yourself around people? I mean it doesn’t have to be jealousy as Avitable has said. Maybe people expect a little more out of you (not that it gives them the right to do so) and feel that you let them down.
I would take some self-inventory and see if there might be a need to change something that will make you more affable and endearing to people. For whatever its worth, I’ve discovered that people expect more from women.
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no man, changing is not the answer. in fact our authentic selves will sufficiently weed out the personalities who are not most compatible with us. putting on a happy face so as to please people who would never like you in the first place seems just…pointless.
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you are clearly intelligent and insightful. I’m a first time reader and plan to add you to my blogroll to keep reading.
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Monique: “full of life” – what an awesome thing to say about someone else. Thanks doll.
anyjazz: I am the queen of the Talkie. Talkie to Death, says the husband.
CMG: you’re so smart.
AmyD: until you get to the point where it stops being productive.
turnbaby: I feel the same way about someone lying about a friend.
TheManintheKitchen: and I’m very bad at the letting them part sometimes.
Sheila: strong women unite! We’re gonna need more t-shirts…
Crazy Lady: aint that the truth.
Bec: LOL, thanks chica.
themuttprincess:
Stephanie: Yep, definitely need to work on the “Not feeding” part. Absolutely.
Crys: me too – glad you’re not them that is. And me too – glad I’m not them that is.
CP: I’m so grateful to be included in a “like us” that includes someone like you.
Laura: do you suppose that comes with a sash? I think I could rock the sash.
HoosierGirl: no WAY would I ever ask all of you awesome people to get into this muck. Ever.
usedtobeme: LOL, sadly, I don’t think so. But we can at least probably retreat to separate corners.
Shellie: I strongly disagree with that. There’s no way anyone can please everyone. Ever.
And as for the inventory? Let’s see…
Am I slut? Nope.
Am I a drunk? Nope.
Am I a shitty wife? Um, not usually.
Is my husband ugly? As he said “obviously, that bitch is crazy, because I am awesome”.
You know, you’re right. That inventory helped.
Crys: A. Men.
Anonymous: thanks – and don’t be shy next time. We don’t bite.
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I’m with Crys….why should Britt have to change herself if she is being 100% authentic? There are people that adore her just the way she is so why pander to the naysayers anyway?
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Can you feel the passion and energy here? Britt: your genuine opening up of your life and feelings has really built an amazingly loyal community (I was glad Shelley survived).
OK, down the constructive path for a moment… I don’t know if you’ve checked it out, but the “How to Win Friends and Influence People” book is so poorly titled: it is NOT how to be phony and manipulative although that’s what it sounds like 70 yrs later. It was really about how people tick and how to avoid counterproductivity through avoiding unnecessary ire and getting on their maps to bring the best possible outcome for all. Definite mgt 101.
It gave me basic housetraining, reforming me from the type-A driven slavemaster who often confronted those I disagreed with, especially if it came to meeting schedule. No doubt similar initiatives to the HS girl’s buttons were executed in my honor. The book is an easy read but I’ll bet you the cost of it you’ll be glad you did. Really.
There’s no perfect defense to internet airheads but it impacted my life with an incredible amount of wisdom that I’ve seen others come by naturally? but that I’d never considered before.
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I’m always surprised at how people can treat other members of the human race. We can’t be liked by everyone just as we don’t like everyone either. The people that can’t stop being mean rather than moving on are the ones that karma will get in the end. Strong willed women seem to have it a little harder. People don’t understand us or they’re jealous. Easier said than done but don’t waste your time giving them any thought. I love ya!
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Really? I’ve heard this “women have it worse” comment several times but my experience in business has been the opposite: men typically show no quarter to other men but are softer on women in similar situations (when their attitude isn’t too bad). Maybe my experience is different than others but I think it’s been consistent.
Just sayin’
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No, jflins, women have it worse. I just think most men really hate you. Most people. So, to you, it just feels like men have it out for you.
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Wow, I didn’t know you were the spokesperson for “most people,” but it does help create an aura that *your* opinion is worth a lot more than it is.
As you’re again pouring out the hatred which several others even in this blog have pointed out your specialty in, it seems so appropriate to paste your first entry to this post:
“Most hate is borne out of jealousy. Someone sees you, looks at their pitiful existence, and just wishes they could have half of the exuberance, ambition, intelligence, and ability that you do. So then they hate you because of who you are and because they have a dozen cats and can’t leave the house without knocking down a wall in their welfare apartment and being driven away on the bed of a flatbed truck…”
Give it up: I might actually be a nice person and just because I’m Christian does not at all warrant your flames. Get a life.
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I don’t hate you. I just find you utterly obnoxious, self-righteous, and stupid. Being Christian has nothing to do with it.
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Jflins said “”men typically show no quarter to other men but are softer on women in similar situations (when their attitude isn’t too bad).”"
Please clarify whose ‘attitude’ you mean.
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Rather feeble attempt to clean up the venom you spewed the first attack you fired on me weeks ago. I’d be shocked if anyone’s buying that.
How you can call anyone obnoxious or self-righteous is beyond incredible, and your hatred seems pretty naked to me.
I’m not on your blog. You loathe what I believe in; you disgust me: what do you say about we stop this love-fest in bringing down the spirit on Britt’s blog by no further contact. I don’t think we could care less about each other’s opinion, no?
I find you a quite sad
I think
I don’t hate you. I just find you utterly obnoxious, self-righteous, and stupid. Being Christian has nothing to do with it.
Doesn’t it seem strange Seems like everyone else sees Feeble attempt to cleanup doesn’t bear out your other venomous posts. Your hatred is naked and all the self-righteous
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I guess the comment was cc’d below the line: my intended post was:
Rather feeble attempt to clean up the venom you spewed the first attack you fired on me weeks ago. I’d be shocked if anyone’s buying that.
How you can call anyone obnoxious or self-righteous is beyond incredible, and your hatred seems pretty naked to me.
I’m not on your blog. You loathe what I believe in; you disgust me: what do you say about we stop this love-fest in bringing down the spirit on Britt’s blog by no further contact. I don’t think we could care less about each other’s opinion, no?
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Jflins, I think you need to take your meds tonight. You’re sounding ten degrees of crazy this time.
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Of course you can’t stop.
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Hey, jflins, tell me what you think about tattoos.
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OK. I have several major tattoos and I regret getting them. Further, your “self-righteous” thing is just baffling to me. I did hard time for most of 13-24 yrs old and was an extremely rotten person. So having proven the sorry state that my best decisions brought, God, in His compassion, transformed my life. I think I’ll have more to answer for than most and am certainly better than no one. I have only compassion for people having a hard time in life.
Adam, you really challenge me. Putting things on your blog like 2 girls defecating into a cup and then eating and vomiting it and then eating that (I sure couldn’t watch past 5 seconds when I realized what was going to happen but read the comments). What are you thinking? There is an integrity in not bringing evil into people’s lives. How can you bring such images and general lasciviousnous into peoples minds? You really played a part there (and many other things). Think about it, brother.
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Ummmm…. this is an interesting turn of the thread, considering the subject matter of the post.
Seriously?
Take it somewhere else. Both of you.
JFlins – I won’t know you well enough to defend you, so I’ll just say that although some of your comments seem a little off the mark, it seems like your intentions are well enough.
Adam, Avitable, I do know. And I will say that he has no issues with Christians – obviously. What he posts on his blog… can be defended on HIS blog.
Now, seriously. Knock it the fuck off – before I ban BOTH of you.
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Summer: thanks love.
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How could anyone hate you? I just don’t understand it. I am really upset about this. And those girls who made the buttons in High School? I just want to wring their necks. I enjoy everything you write and think you are brilliant. To all the Britt-haters – UP YOURS!
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You are an extremely spectacular person – much like myself – and as a result, there will be people who envy the dog poop you step in.
The best thing to do is laugh it off and thank the lucky stars that you are of a strong personality. I’ve always rather be one with a strong personality then one with no personality at all!
:heartbeat:
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Wow! Really….wow! Not sure I want to carry on with this blogging thing if it gets to be this much fun!
hgreatone:
Seriously, I’ve only been de-lurked for a little while and Britt you have been so friendly, warm and welcoming. As lots of others said earlier, you really do have to walk away or you will become infected by the same poison that infects these sad excuses for people. Don’t let that happen! I also know damn well that it’s a LOT easier said than done. Take comfort and strength from your friends..they are the ones that matter.
PS I am so jealous of your huge list of smilies, if I had time I would add about 30 of them to this comment!
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Selma: oh honey, please don’t let THIS upset you. It’s OK, really. It’s a little disturbing and what not – but overall I still think there is way more good in this world than there is bad.
Sarcastica: that is true, we’re definitely more fun at parties.
Penelope: oh no, you should definitely keep it up. The pros far outweigh the cons, believe me.
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Wow. My best friend and I had a little “I hate so and so” club, but we never made buttons and we only talked about it at home.
in hindsight we were silly and immature. And So and So? Wouldn’t mind trying to get to know her now that we’re grown.
As for you? I only know the you, you present. And I like you enough to come back often. And I think I’ve been reading for (years?) a very long time. So I don’t get it. But we can’t be loved by everyone. And those that do love you? those are the only opinions that matter anyway.
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Whoever it is certainly didn’t even deserve a post on your blog, but as usual, you put things so eloquently!
You rock. Period.
:rock:
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Britt, I’ve only just met you, but you have been nothing but kind, beautiful and funny. A combo that the haters seem to fear and envy.
The more heart you put out there, the more there is for nasty people to trample on (why they like to do that I’ll never understand). But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put your heart out there because there are so many more of us here who appreciate it.
Keep being yourself. The people that matter will be around to enjoy what you have to say. The rest don’t matter.
Having just been a target myself, I can honestly say that laughter is the best medicine. I mean, really sit down and take a look at your life and do some comparisons. I think that should make you feel better really quick. It did me.
((((HUGS)))))
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Oh, and Fab is awesome! And I’m just getting to know Avi, too but I can tell he has a heart of gold like you and Fab do. I can see why you all are friends. :hug:
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Hey Britt-
I am blondeblogger’s daughter. I have seen a few of your comments and now read your blog today. I just wanted to let you know it was the same way with me. Instead, I just knew it was always coming and was prepared for it instead. People either loved me or hated me.
Even on the online world I could make people so so hateful. I think it is because, like your husband said, we are strong people.
With that you get people who are jealous. People who are weak and envious of you. The important thing is that you know nothing is wrong with you.
These people (in real life and blogging world) have no self confidence and they derive it from putting down people who have friends, are strong, beautiful, and better than them. Hehe.
I’ve only read a few of your posts but I already like ya!
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Oopsie didn’t mean to be anon
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I can’t imagine someone not liking you. They way I look at blogs is this: If I like what I read, I may or may not comment. If I don’t like the site – I click the red x in the corner, but to “attack” the person, is just so uncalled for.
Sorry someone was mean, I hope that they get over themselves, and move on – for their own sanity.
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i don’t know what the hell i missed this past week while i was out of town without internet access, but i find it difficult that anyone could possibly hate you. my money is on pure jealousy. because you my dear, are wonderful. in so many ways.
:heartbeat:
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