I’ll give you $112 every 30 days with a smile

by Miss Britt on January 7, 2008

Dear Cymbalta Maker People,

I should be your new spokesperson. Seriously.

It’s been 3 weeks since we.. er… met. I cannot even believe how much has changed since then.

It’s almost impossible to imagine that just three short weeks ago I was fantasizing about how long I could stay under water in a desperate attempt to escape. This time last month I was spending most of my time curled up in my room, trying to sleep away the world that loomed on the other side of the bedroom door.

Within 48 hours of taking that first pill, I noticed a change. The fog lifted and the weight I had been carrying around for so long disappeared. I was nervous at first, wondering how long this would last and when the next meltdown would come.

But as the days, and then weeks, went by – the meltdown didn’t come. And the energy I don’t even remember having returned. And where despair once haunted me, I found instead… peace. Balance. Perspective.

I still cry. I still laugh. I still get mad at my husband. I’m still worried about how my kids will “turn out”.

But now I can see those emotions with a certain amount of perspective that I didn’t have before. The emotions are not overwhelming and irrational. For the first time in a long time, I’m in control.

AND…

My laundry room is clean.
My kitchen cabinets are rearranged.
My hall closet is cleaned and organized.
My laundry is done.
My front living room is painted (well, OK, one coat down, one to go. But trust me, that’s progress.)

AND…

I have spent two Saturdays alone with my kids all day – and not lost my mind.
I made “the big breakfast” that I “never make anymore”.
I cooked Sunday dinner (while painting, mind you) that included both a ham AND a side casserole.
I’ve given baths and read stories and gotten hair cuts and helped put toys away… all without feeling like I was trying to hold back the avalanche with a pencil. Alone.

My husband has remarked numerous times that he’s considering having me “checked” to see if I’m “on something”. I keep reminding him I am on something. (Speaking of which, do you make something for husbands? Like an anti-retard, try to use your other head from time to time pill?)

ANYway Cymbalta maker people, thank you.

I think I’m getting my life back. I think, maybe, I’m getting me back. And I kind of like this me.

Eternally Grateful,

Miss Britt

P.S. Seriously, the spokesperson thing – you should think about it. Maybe we can work something out like… say… free pills? Because oh mah shit – the price of happiness these days is steep!

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Posted in Personal - Growth and Things I'm Trying To Learn

51 Comments so far

  1. Sheila January 7, 2008 12:10 am

    I’m glad that things are working out for you! And, if you hear of an anti-retard pill, please post about it immediately. Thanks.

    Reply

  2. Tori January 7, 2008 12:23 am

    I’m so happy to read this… I ran out of happy pills on vacation and now realize it’s something I’ll take forever… just like any other medication that saves lives….

    Reply

  3. avitable January 7, 2008 12:28 am

    You should spend more time over here. I have laundry that needs doing, too, and my office is a mess that really needs to be tidied.

    Reply

  4. Dee January 7, 2008 12:37 am

    Yay :clap:

    Reply

  5. Mary January 7, 2008 12:38 am

    You go girl!!!

    Reply

  6. jflins January 7, 2008 1:05 am

    Wow -productivity AND temperament: I’m right now SCHEMING to spike my wife’s food :evil:

    Amy Carmichael (my hero: last century Mother Teresa-type) in chronic pain would thank God for each of her pills. “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights…” James 1:17

    So glad you’ve been blessed!

    Reply

  7. Dave2 January 7, 2008 4:40 am

    I’m looking for an alternative to crystal meth that doesn’t have as many side effects. Perhaps I should be looking into Cymbalta! Do you have a recipe so I can cook it up in my kitchen and save money?

    Reply

  8. Dan January 7, 2008 5:42 am

    Jolly Good!

    Reply

  9. Selma January 7, 2008 7:42 am

    I am genuinely pleased for you. This is wonderful news!

    Reply

  10. Nobody™ January 7, 2008 7:49 am

    It’s good stuff, I like it too. But it makes me wake up every god damn hour at night. And that pisses me off. I guess it is better than sleeping 22 hours a day.

    Reply

  11. Coal Miner's Granddaughter January 7, 2008 8:09 am

    That is such great news, Britt! Yeah! :D

    Reply

  12. Miss Britt January 7, 2008 8:33 am

    Sheila: maybe we should develop one… we’d be rich!!

    Tori: I haven’t thought yet about how long I might need to take it – I’m just glad I have the option of taking it right now.

    avitable: um, no. I could, however, slip some to your wife. :evil:

    Dee: :cheesy:

    Mary: thanks!

    jflins: yeah, me too.

    Dave2: hopefully this doesn’t make my teeth fall out. If the price is any indication, the recipe for this stuff calls for Pixie Dust – can you get your hands on some of that?

    Dan: heh, I wish I had an appropriately british response.

    Selma: it is indeed.

    Nobody™: yeah, I do sleep pretty restlessly – which sucks. I’ve found taking it about an hour before bed instead of RIGHT before bed helps a little. I don’t know why.

    Coal Miner’s Granddaughter: yeah, I’m pretty pleased so far!

    Reply

  13. debkitty January 7, 2008 8:36 am

    It is amazing what a little pharmaceutical happiness can change!

    I am so happy for you!

    Reply

  14. Peggy January 7, 2008 8:41 am

    I’m so glad you are feeling better. Let me know if they continue to work. I think I’m actually due for a change.
    Grrr!

    Reply

  15. NotaGranny January 7, 2008 8:56 am

    :thumbsup:

    Will you come to my house and arrange my cabinets, paint my bedroom? Please, pretty please?

    Reply

  16. Mr. Fabulous January 7, 2008 9:12 am

    Amen, sister! I take it faithfully every day, or I am a mess. Maybe we can do commercials together, like those ones that James Garner and Mariette Hartley did back in the 80’s. I liked those.

    Reply

  17. Finn January 7, 2008 9:19 am

    Ah, better living through chemistry. I’m so happy for you. :thumbsup: I feel the same way about Wellbutrin.

    Life is good when you’re properly medicated!

    Reply

  18. Poppy January 7, 2008 9:42 am

    Yaaaaaay to feeling better, booooo to overpriced pharmaceuticals!

    Reply

  19. Turnbaby January 7, 2008 9:44 am

    I’m very happy it’s working for you sugar–you needed a break ;-)

    Reply

  20. Poppy January 7, 2008 9:45 am

    And boooo for getting my own email address wrong.

    Reply

  21. wafelenbak January 7, 2008 9:55 am

    :clap:
    Yay indeed! So glad you are feeling better, and that you found something that works for you!!

    Reply

  22. themuttprincess January 7, 2008 10:21 am

    That is fanfuckingtastic!

    I am happy to hear you are doing MUCH MUCH MUCH better!

    Reply

  23. Robin January 7, 2008 10:28 am

    Meds can be a beautiful thing, I’m very thankful to Adderall.

    Reply

  24. hellohahanarf January 7, 2008 10:42 am

    my mom always said, “don’t be ashamed of better living through modern chemistry.”

    can’t tell you how happy it makes me to know that you are feeling so much better. yay!

    :hug:

    Reply

  25. NYCWD January 7, 2008 11:18 am

    :clap: This is awesome!!! :hug:

    Reply

  26. RW January 7, 2008 11:49 am

    Looks like a good idea to me!

    Reply

  27. Miss Britt January 7, 2008 12:02 pm

    debkitty: it really is, it has worked much better than I could have imagined.

    Peggy: of course I’ll keep you updated!

    NotaGranny: sure… as soon as I’m done with mine.

    Mr. Fab: OK – so long as they cover my monthly bill. Can’t have you cutting in my profits.

    Finn: and surprisingly enough, I keep TELLING everyone I’m medicated. Is that weird?

    Poppy: yeah, I do kind of want to show up at every political rally right now and ask about rising drug costs now.

    Turnbaby: I did indeed.

    wafelenbak: yeah, me too

    themuttprincess: see? exactly the reaction a manufacturer should want to their commercials! I’d be perfect!

    Robin: I don’t know much about that one.

    hellohahanarf: yeah – I tell anyone who will listen I’m so tickled about it. LOL

    NYCWD: :-)

    RW: me as a spokesmodel? I know!

    Reply

  28. Finn January 7, 2008 1:15 pm

    Not at all. I don’t know why, but it’s perfectly normal. Maybe because you cease to give a shit.

    Reply

  29. missi January 7, 2008 2:09 pm

    That is great! I am so happy you found the one that works for you on the first try!

    I know those damn pills are steep.

    I have to take a “mood cocktail”. I have 3 types and combined my total is $110 a month, but it is worth every penny to have some sanity.

    Reply

  30. AmyD January 7, 2008 2:13 pm

    I’m so glad!!! Good for you!!!
    :heartbeat:

    And, of course, now you can’t tease me about being medicated, can you? :nana:

    Reply

  31. Hilly January 7, 2008 4:12 pm

    I am so happy for you, yay! I totally remember that feeling and it was one of the best in the world.

    I think you should send them a video audition to be spokesperson :) .

    Reply

  32. Lynda January 7, 2008 4:41 pm

    Woohoo! I am glad things are going better for you!

    Reply

  33. On a Limb with Claudia January 7, 2008 6:14 pm

    I’m delighted that things are better for you! How great that the cloud has lifted! :clap:

    Reply

  34. Nina January 7, 2008 6:52 pm

    MMM delicious cymbalta. Glad it is working out for you. :heartbeat:

    Reply

  35. Summer January 7, 2008 7:21 pm

    I’m very happy for you Brit. I have been in that same pain and now take Zoloft. I first noticed it working for me when I could hear the birds singing again. I’d beg, borrow or steal for this med. As I say, better living through chemistry.

    Reply

  36. Bec January 7, 2008 7:32 pm

    Seriously that good? After the up/down/this shit doesn’t work relationship I’ve had with ‘happy’ pills over the years… and woo-hoo available in UK!

    Reply

  37. Rich | Championable January 7, 2008 8:32 pm

    You think they’d let us do a dual commercial?

    “Hi, I’m Miss Britt for Cymbalta!”

    “And I’m Rich | Championable for Focalin!”

    Or something like that.

    Reply

  38. Tense Teacher January 7, 2008 9:27 pm

    So glad to hear that you feel better! :heartbeat:

    Reply

  39. Nobody™ January 7, 2008 11:07 pm

    Thanks for the tip. I’ll try taking it a bit earlier and see if I sleep better.

    Reply

  40. Fantastagirl January 7, 2008 11:08 pm

    And when a mama is happy – everyone is happy! I’m glad you found something that works!

    Reply

  41. WendyB January 7, 2008 11:18 pm

    This sounds like heaven. Any side effects? Like…weight gain? Because weight gain tends to nullify all antidepressant qualities for me.

    Reply

  42. Miss Britt January 8, 2008 12:21 pm

    Finn: I suppose I can see that.

    missi: yeah, I know some people who get theirs for like $10 a month. I guess even my brain chemistry has expensive taste. Figures.

    AmyD: OMG I would never tease you about that!

    Although, now that I am medicated, I think that means I CAN tease you…

    Hilly: of course! They’ll see my sparkle and charm and HAVE to “hire” me!

    Lynda: me too, thanks. :-)

    On a Limb with Claudia: sunshine, sunshine!

    Nina: it’s better than chocolate.

    Summer: beg, borrow, sleep with some guy on the corner – whatever.

    Bec: I’m hoping I’ve been lucky enough to miss that up/down trial and error I have heard so much about. *fingers crossed*

    Rich: they should, we’d be awesome.

    Tense Teacher: :heartbeat:

    Nobody™: hope it does!

    Fantastagirl: everyone does look a little less “terrified” around here.

    WendyB: sleep patterns a little funky as Nobody mentioned.

    Actually, it’s curbed my appetite a bit (which is a feat for me) – I guess we’ll see…

    Reply

  43. AmyD January 8, 2008 12:27 pm

    Good point. Good point.

    Reply

  44. Rich | Championable January 8, 2008 2:35 pm

    Holy SHIT you get a lot of comments. DAMN.

    Reply

  45. Miss Britt January 8, 2008 3:24 pm

    Yeah, now, if only comments = dollars

    or shoes

    or diamonds

    Something.

    Reply

  46. Lee January 8, 2008 3:54 pm

    Hey Britt!
    I’m so glad that you’re feeling so good. I am a fellow med taker. I’ve been on fluoxetine(generic for prozac) for several years now. The difference in my life has been amazing and I completely second your statement on feeling like you’re finally yourself, that you’re in control of your own life. Those who have never had depression probably don’t know the feeling of being trapped inside your own head, but it’s horrible and being freed from it is amazing. very happy for you!

    Reply

  47. Geeky Tai-Tai January 9, 2008 1:08 am

    I’m so happy that you’re feeling better, and I’m very glad that you sought help. So many people suffer needlessly because they don’t want to take “drugs”, yet they’ll take antibiotics for a bacterial infection. :D

    Reply

  48. The Absurdist January 9, 2008 3:26 pm

    Despite the fact that you got Cymbalta from a general practictioner, as I mentioned before in your previous post that so far, it is the best solutiont to my depression swing of my bipolar disorder.

    I still recommend finding a good psychiastrist who insists that you see a therapist as well, since the combination of psychotherapy and medication are the most effective way to relieve situational depression that as converted into chronic depression. Please do not underestimate this statement.

    99% of all therapists are bad. I recommend a cognitive therapist who is hard to get in to see. This means that they are good. Also, many, may of your friends have probably seen a psychotherapist in their lifetime, and can recommend someone.

    You can see someone with an LPC, but I also recommend someone who has also completed their master’s degree in psychotherapy.

    Like I have always said, I am a definitive expert in all of these types of things, and you have my phone number. Please feel free to call me anytime. And the v-log that I am posting today is no reflection of the true manifestation of emotional, mental and spiritual health that I have obtained over many years of therapy.

    Reply

  49. The Absurdist January 9, 2008 3:30 pm

    Oh,and BTW, guys, the retail price on my bipolar meds is over $700 bucks. So $110 is totally worth it, girl. Usually runs about $250 with insurance!

    But I take 120 mg of Cymbalta (no generic)
    400 MG of Lamictal (no generic)
    200 MG of provigil (no generic)
    Iron pills (OTC)
    and Xanax as needed. Hadn’t taken it in months until last week.

    Reply

  50. radioactivegirltori May 30, 2008 9:03 am

    Don’t mind me stalking your archives here. I know you are busy right now, and I’ve been thinking of you and hoping things are going well. I wish I could come help you!

    I just started taking Wellbutrin a few days ago, and I can not believe the difference it has made. My symptoms were just “tired all the time” and I didn’t think I was depressed because I’m always so happy. Turns out you can be depressed without the sad. I had no idea. I’m glad your medicine is working for you, and I’m glad we both have alternatives to help us. I can not wait to meet you because I feel like we are living almost the same lives sometimes. (not a creepy stalker, I swear!)

    My husband says they used to use wellbutrin to help people get off heroin. Apparently that is my problem…I should have been taking heroin!

    Reply

  51. Talon August 15, 2008 4:08 pm

    Hi.

    :)

    Yeah, this is a very old post, but that’s what I’ve been doing lately. Finding new blogs to read and reading back entries.

    See…this one struck a chord with me, because a few years ago I was put on Cymbalta. I had been off anti-depressants since 2003…ironically the second time my life went to shit. The first time was in 1997 when my newborn son died. The second time, in 2003 was when my daughter was 3, and my disease flared for the first time.

    It took me awhile to realize that the zoloft I had relied on since my post-partum depression no longer worked since I had weaned my daughter. And unfortunately it also came at a time that I could not get any mental health help because of insurance issues.

    So a couple of years later, when my disease was more or less straightened out and I wasn’t losing 50 lbs worth of blood, water and extra adipose in a month’s time anymore and I had real insurance and a brand new doctor she gave me Cymbalta.

    And within two weeks I felt like myself again. Holy fuck, it was amazing!!!

    Recently I have had another flare of my stupid disease, and no insurance, and no cymbalta. I am just now getting back on it (Thank you Medicade, and thank you for my Remicade either, I like not being in constant, crippling pain and not bleeding internally, truly!!). I have had a really rough past couple of weeks/months, and your depression posts could have been written by me, I swear.

    Anyway, I love Cymbalta, except for the electric brain shocks and the sexual side effects. But I can live with those for the sheer sensation of feeling like Talon. Really and truly feeling like myself.

    So anyway…yeah.

    :) Yay for Cymbalta.

    Reply

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