Guys, listen.
I can’t today.
I just don’t have it in me.
Someone else… do it.
Someone else…. say something. Anything. Please.
Unless it’s advice. Dear God help us all if anyone tries to give me advice.
The floor is yours.
Posted in Bitching Again, Blogging Tips, Tricks and Junk for Other Bloggers, It's All About Me, just rambling
You know what you should have done? Invited your readers to ask you questions that you would answer.
You totally should have stolen a meme from Myspace to post today.
Would you like to hear a great joke?
So would I.
Oh wait, I know one…
Q: What’s brown and sticky?
A: A stick. What are you, fucking stupid?
Never give me the floor.
:doh:
I agree. It’s one of those days.
It must be this “severe” weather that’s getting to us.
What if, instead of taking the floor, I leave it right where it is and do a cha-cha dance for you naked?
I promise not to kick you in the face like I did my husband. I am more gentle with tiny little ladies.
you look gorgeous today. i’m sure of it.
:coffee:
:violent029:
Havin one of those?
:sex011:
i just always wanted to use this one.
also this:
:violent006:
^
^
^
That was me… just not logged in.
I have a bra on today that makes me look I actually HAVE boobs, but it makes me itch. Nothing like wandering around Target having to scratch the girls every 2.2 seconds.
I bet you’re wearing some kick ass shoes today, right?
I’m not going to give you any advice, but Mae West is:
“My advice to those who think they have to take off their clothes to be a star is, once you’re boned, what’s left to create the illusion? Let ‘em wonder. I never believed in givin’ them too much of me.”
So, let ‘em wonder…
What did one snowman say to the other?
“Do you smell carrots?”
Something.
Anything.
Please.
I need to find a deodorant that doesn’t make me feel all itchy.
You could always do what I do and draw a picture of your feelings, put in on your blog and call it a post. Oh wait, that might sound like advice.
How about you just have a few drinks and we’ll see you tomorrow?
Rich, try one without alcohol in it or without aluminum in it. I hear one of those is usually what makes people itchy. I might be spreading lies, inadvertently.
Here is my favorite (and famous) song to make my kids eat rice:
The rice goes in the belly,
it soaks up all the water,
it makes you poop a mountain,
Ya! Ya! Ya!
See what happens when you yield the floor? :dazed:
:surrender:
I was reminded of you last night when I met a couple that I want to “date”…haha! They came over to buy the elliptical that I was selling and we hit it off right away :).
What is an Australian kiss?
It’s like a French kiss only ‘down under’. :sex014:
what’s gonna fix you??
This: :coffee: ? … or this
?
let us know… somehow we’ll fix you!
See—they came thru for you. The comments are great!!!!
WTF are you doing up at 6:38 a.m. posting?
How is you have no ’shoe’ smiley????
OKay–here’s something to which you can relate. I woke up this morning with what i KNEW was the start of a UTI. Of course it was because i have a big hearing tomorrow that I have to prepare for. So i send the DH to the store to get me some cranberry juice. I WRITE DOWN 100% cranberry juice—not ‘cocktail’ or blend.
He comes back with two enormous bottles of “Traditional Cranberry”—that’s in big letters followed by the smaller letters saying—”flavored juice blended with two fruit juices from concentrate with added ingredients”
Oh it does say “100% juice” on the bottle.
*sigh*
From the way it tastes I think one of the ‘other juices’ is prune.
I hope you put on some cute shoes and say ‘fuck it’
Smooch
Britt Britt bo bit
banana fanna fo fitt
fe fi fo mo mitt
BRITT!!!
– sorry, it was the best I could do and it took me all morning to come up with this. :drool:
it’s going around! we should schedule a Miss Britt blog seminar in Orland-io. i just thought of that and frankly i think it’s brilliant. it could be at some fab hotel near a lot of rad bars and we could be retarded the whole time.
plz implement and get back to me with eta
of course we’d need speakers. you’d have to maybe be the main speaker and potentially even speak at every scheduled event, because the rest of us would be drunk or naked.
yes, this is so good…
well okay if you FORCE me i would be a speaker. only if i get to wear a Pope’s hat though, because i’m spur-tual
I would ABSOLUTELY come to Orlando for a “Miss Britt Blog Semina”
How about you come up with something for me to write about and I will do the same for you??!!??!!??
Now now sugah… Come to Momma… There there…
((((((HUG))))))
think of all the fun we could have…
You people. Seriously. I wasn’t even going to respond to comments today but who can ignore all of your awesomeness?
avitable: I WILL PUNCH YOU IN YOUR TEARS!
jester: I should have clarified - I wanted you to dance.
Peggy: LOL, yeah! that must be it!
ADW:
very nice. Now - video. Please.
hellohahanarf: heh. I have on no makeup. No product in my hair, which is in a half ass pony tail. And my t-shirt is showing my gut.
I. am. hawt.
DeannaBanana: oh, you know me. Always buckets o’ fun!
t: i think we’ve done something good here.
Kellie: white and red tennies. So, no - not really. Your illusions are smashed now - aren’t they?
Finn: um, I don’t actually get naked you know…
or do you mean I give to much of ME?
I’m confused. LOL
RW: *snicker*
NYCWD: why does that sound hauntingly poetic or something?
Rich: no, you don’t. Those all natural things won’t make you itch - but you’ll stink. It is better to itch than to stink, my friend.
Nina: I don’t know if I could draw this:
:violent01:
:violent029: 
Poppy: it happens.
Mom: my kids also love that song.
Fogspinner: ditto
Hilly: did you exchange numbers??
metalmom: I knew there was a reason I liked the Aussie.
Tori: awwwww - i think maybe… ummm… this
and this 
and this :lmfao:
gramps: they really did, didn’t they?
usedtobeme : avoiding my family? No, wait, that was last night.
Turnbaby: swap UTI with Daughter’s Princess Room and “juice cocktail” with pen lines. And yes, exactly, I do.
AmyD: fo shame! LOL
Crys: I’m open Sunday. And Also January 2nd. And January 17th - which is my birthday, and would be especially fitting.
Plus that should give me enough time to find my pope hat.
Turnbaby: are we going to need a registration page? Someone quick - get on that!
themuttprincess: OK - you do… um… apple pie. Or Prince. Or me, and Prince, and somehow work in an apple pie.
Now me.
DutchBitch: ahhh, your boobies are so soft and comforting.
just because you aren’t wearing makeup, have a crazy ponytail and are wearing a tiny t-shirt doesn’t mean that you aren’t gorgeous. to there.
i’ve invited jester to meet me in vegas. late january. you should consider a girls getaway as a belated birthday present to you.
(cracking up at you, prince & an apple pie)
how about i typed “to there” instead of “so there” and i slapped my forhead so hard that i have a red mark
clearly you’ve misread me. i’m not sure there’s room at this blog bonanza for two very rad pope hats. can you smell what the rock is cooking
OMG
“pen”
NOOOOOOOOOOO
LMAO but
:what:
Allyson: oooh - where in Florida? Welcome to the transplant club!
hellohahanarf: well, I’ll have to see if that collides with Brittapalooza.
Crys: oh sweetheart - I smell it. I was digging it up so you could BORROW it, silly.
I’m going to wear my wings.
Turnbaby: technically it’s really, really dark unersable penicl.
It just LOOKS like pen…
Ahem. Pencil.
I went off the pill last month. I have a lot to say about that, but won’t on my own blog yet because my parents read, and I don’t want to answer questions. sigh. Not pregnant yet, but these not-pregnant-plus-PMS hormones are killing me.
Thanks. I feel better.
I think you are really pretty and smart.
And you smell good.
If everything seems under control, you’re not going fast enough. - Mario Andretti
:sex012:
No advice (I’m far from qualified), but I did give you a link to Pavarotti and Sting on my blog.
Have you tried either dryer sheets(it’s weird but they do work)–or the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser?
I am not sure how they might affect the paint but better than dark pencil lines–has he NEVER seen Trading Spaces??? Use TAPE man!!
Oh and I needed to say thanks–I don’t vent much about the DH on my blog. Thanks for the venue —hee hee.
I had a bad day too… :yuck:
Sarasota. Thanks! The last time I was able to read your blog you were still just thinking of moving to Florida. I see I have some catching up to do.
sarah: anytime - and good luck!!!!
Mr. Fab: aww, thanks, that was so genuine!!
geek: hm, well, there’s that LOL
Tense Teacher: ooh, sweet, will be back over asap!
Turnbaby: DH venting always allowed.
And he used tape - he just used the pencil to.. uh.. irritate me? I dunno.
But he painted over all the lines last night and it looks pretty good now.
Dave2:
Allyson: i LOVED Sarasota when I was a kid. Haven’t been in forever, but remember it fondly. :-)
omg why are you awake at this ungodly hour
Dude, I leave my house by 7:10/7:15 every morning.
Ahhhh rush hour…