I’ve stopped wearing make up almost entirely. I haven’t done my hair in two weeks. Most days I come to work wearing a T-Shirt and jeans. And not a cute vintage looking casual chic t-shirt – the same T-shirt I’m probably going to wear to bed later that night.
I know that’s no big deal for a lot of people. I realize that many woman go all natural on a regular basis, and that’s cool. But for me? I’m not that girl. My lack of concern for my physical appearance isn’t a sign that I’m outgrowing vanity.
It’s because I’m just too tired to care.
(Yes, depression, signs, blah blah blah, I know.)
I would expect anyone that knows me to notice, after a while. I would hope that the person who lives with me would see that I’m just not trying anymore – and wonder.
It’s not his job to fix me. It’s not his fault that I feel like this. It’s not his job, it’s not his fault, it’s not about him. I know. I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW!
But I resent like hell that he doesn’t ask.
I come home and take a nap after work more often than not now. Sometimes that means the kids don’t get dinner until 7 or 7:30. And while I know it’s not going to kill them, it’s definitely outside of the norm. And it’s not what I want for them, or for me.
It’s not his fault I’m tired. It’s not his job to make me get out of bed and face my life. I know. I know I know I know I know I KNOW.
But I hate that he doesn’t pick up the pieces while I sleep. I hate that uses that time to sit on the couch and watch TV while the world continues to pile up outside my door, waiting for me to get back to it. And while he’ll happily do anything I ask as long as I’m standing over him watching it get done like some kind of task master from hell – I’m so tired of having to ask.
He can’t fix me.
This isn’t about him.
I know that in my head, but it doesn’t stop me from being angry.
Or lonely.
I wish he would carry the world for me, run with it while I quietly fall apart in the background.
I wish he would wrap the Christmas presents like he promised to, because I’m not going to keep asking. I can’t handle the resentment mixed with guilt for being a nag and a drain.
I wish he would figure out the health insurance papers like he promised to, instead of collapsing on the sofa beside me while I try to drown out the world. I’m not going to ask or expect more because it’s not fair – but I’m seething with disappointment.
I wish he would encourage me to get out of the house or go get my nails done, instead of happily accepting my excuses of wanting to save money and being too tired.
I wish he wouldn’t pretend not to hear when I complain about the constant pain in my neck and back, and offer a massage. Because I’m not going to ask and feel like a burden.
I know it’s not fair. I know I’m expecting him to read my mind. I know I’m hoping for skills that he is simply not equipped with. I know it’s better than being alone. I know he’s a good father and husband and I’m lucky and being selfish and must be absolutely awful to be married to right now and oh my God yes I am still talking about all of this. I know.
I know.
But I wish…
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Posted in Love and Marriage
I wish my left hand was a hamburger.
And I’m sorry that right now you have three children instead of two. :heartbeat:
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i wish he had the desire to change so that you could simply print this and hand it to him.
:heartbeat:
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Britt, I understand how you feel, but make sure you consider in your wish list someone who goes with whatever the flow happens to be. What if “noticing” that you weren’t getting all pretty every day meant him criticizing for looking all hot every day? uh, nnoooooooo.. That would SUCK. Men are really simple creatures. Go to him you would like him to notice that you are not yourself that you would like for him to take over the entire world so you can…. etc. Just tell him what you want him to do. He probably will.
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Honey, I love you. I truly do, but I am not going to blow sunshine up your ass here. Hoping silently for change is about as productive as trying to piss up a rope. I know you want more, but expecting him to know, untold, to suddenly be intuitive when it goes against his grain, is a complete exercise in futility. Ask for change. Make your pining productive instead of adding to your sadness. It will serve you both well. yes, good husband, good father, good friend, blah blah blah. Sometimes we wish for different. Wishes don’t mean shit baby, ask for your needs to be met, then Jared has a slight chance of succeeding.
I love you. Lets go get our nails done this weekend and out for lunch. Screw saving money, you dont see hearses pulling U-Hauls.
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Britt… :hug:
You know you’re going to be happier when you live the life you want (NEED) to. I can’t tell you how to get to that, but you can find the way. Until then you will continue to be unhappy and you will continue to wish for things that will never happen. (Never. Hear me. Never.)
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I surely agree with my insightful daughter. Our men cannot read the signs, but come through when we just tell them. Use your words.
Now, you’re getting just TOO MUCH advice, aren’t you.
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I think that your momma is right. Use your words. Men (along with most people) are not able to read our minds. You will feel better to let it all out, and he will be up to date on what you are thinking/feeling.
And if that doesn’t work, a bottle of vodka should do the trick.
:heartbeat: :martini: :heartbeat:
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Help is on the way baby.
I love you
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Hmmm…. what to say?
How about this… We love you and care about you and want you to be healthy and happy. Oh and to wear makeup. Just kidding.
Tell him. Sit down and tell him. I know where you are at. Really.
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~~Hugs~~
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He is a man and isn’t equipped with sonar….Clue him in! Talk to him.
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Just went through all of this myself. I don’t cry often, but when I do, the other humans in this house get scared-it’s not pretty. That’s the time when I explode and vomit forth all the things that weigh me down. I end up exhausted and suddenly EVERYTHING gets done around here and they all kiss my ass.
YOU MUST ASK! :heartbeat:
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*Blink* I think I was sucked into this computer and zapped to Florida.
I have wished, hoped for, begged for the same things over and over for the last 10 years. *Sigh*
Luckily there is a light at the end of the tunnel, really. I swear there is.
In the mean time keep talking, even to yourself. Bottling up… Bad Idea. Trust me. No really, just Trust me on that one. :hug:
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I could have wrote this myself. I know ALL to well how you’re feeling. So well, it’s freaky.
I hope you are able to find a solution that works for you; be it medication, a vacation, SUN!, a spa trip, SOMETHING!
Hugs. I heart you Britt :kiss:
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avitable: I think your left hand IS a hamburger. Bite it and see.
hellohahanarf: he he, me too.
Nina: I do appreciate that he goes with the flow. It definitely has it’s advantages 90% of the time.
DeannaBanana: LOL, I know you love me. And I have actually, very explicitly, tried to tell him.
But you’ve got a great point about those U-Haul hearses. I’m getting a facial and massage tonight after work.
Poppy: I know. I just have to learn how to better accept the never.
Momma: LOL advice is what the Internet does best. Ironically, I gave your daughter similar advice about a week ago!
themuttprincess: I have told him – and he tries in spurts. Maybe I need to let go of how much I hate having to KEEP telling. Over and over again.
Mom: love you too, and thanks.
ADW: oh no, trust me, the whole world needs me to wear makeup!
NotaGranny: i love hugs!
Debkitty: I know he’s not equipped with sonar (although how cool would that be!) The thing is, I have told him.
I don’t think he’s equipped with a very good memory either.
metalmom: can I ask – how long does that “everything gets done around here” euphoria last?
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My head just exploded. Accepting the never and letting go of having to tell him over and over are very sore points for me, and a very big reason why I am going through what I am going through right now. Wish you could join me, but I understand you can’t. For the kids.
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Sweetheart, let’s get practical. Get off your own ass. You beat yourself up too much. You have every right to all of those feelings regardless of the obvious and the “I KNOWS!”
He’s good at “checking out” but maybe you need to be better at it. Make him a list, kick him out of the bedroom, and check out. Give yourself a damn break. A little “tough love” isn’t going to kill him. :heartbeat:
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Holy Shit!!! We’re married to the same man!
I quit asking years ago because I got tired of nagging. I quit complaining years ago becuase I got tired of hearing my own voice. I quit expecting him to pick it up years ago becuase, well, I just quit.
It’s on me. It will always be on me. He gets home FOUR hours before I do and he picks up the kids from school. That covers it most of the time. He could start dinner, but he doesn’t. He could do a load of laundry, but he doesn’t. He could sweep, but he doesn’t.
I know where you be sista. I feel for you and I think you should go to the doc becuase it will help. I shoulda went to the doc too, but that is another issue for another day. I learned to adapt and cope and now I bitch and blog in private and that works for me.
OH! Maybe that is what you need. A private blog where no one reads who knows who the hell you are (not mom or Avi, or even us lurkers (well, except me of course) and then you lay it out there. All the truths, fears, feelings and such. Because believe me, there are things on my blog that I would NEVER say to a living person. EVER. But at least I have an outlet.
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New here but wanted to send you this…
:hug:
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Men don’t notice if the house is a mess and we’re laying on the couch in the middle of the day with no make-up, they just think we’re coming to our senses and acting more like them. You have to TELL him. And get a giggle when you see the completely stunned look on his face because he had no clue.
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I know how you feel. I am going through some of that myself.
:poke:
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Sweetheart, I don’t think it’s too much to ask to have your life partner, your other half, to pick up your slack and prop you up when you can’t stand anymore.
It mystifies me that men can sit there while we’re falling apart and not see it — especially when we are responsible for running the show. It seems to me the signs are obvious. It also mystifies me that we women keep lumping the responsibility on ourselves. Granted, if you’re keeping up the front that all is well you cannot expect him to get it. But a complete change in routine, grooming, etc. SCREAMS depression. There are even commercials on TV about it. Do you look like the woman on the Cymbalta commercial that hasn’t washed her hair since Meredith left “The View”?
But boys are stupid, as we all know. Try one more time — tell him you’re ready to go to bed and stay there — forever. Tell him you are incapable of doing anything but breathing right now and you’d appreciate having another adult around to pick up your slack until you get to the doc and the meds kick in. Tell him he has no choice. And if he doesn’t get it after that, don’t get out of bed one day.
I’ve been through this and back again. It took me a lot of fighting and a lot of letting him know that I had one foot out the door, but it finally got through.
Seriously, girl, e-mail me.
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Around here, the euphoria lasts 3 months. Then things slowly go back to “par for the course” And then another 3 months of “business as usual”. But normally for me, the first 3 months is all I need to ‘recharge’.
Good luck!!
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Well you’ve got a helluva lot of advice here and some of it is the same that I would give. But since you are a lot like me in the hearing advice department, I will talk about me. I’ve stopped too…looking cute. I just had an epiphany while packing that it’s been so long since I’ve cared. Sure, some of that is my medical situation but not really….I’ve gained weight in the last year, I’ve stopped caring about cute shoes and the latest in lip gloss…and many other things.
I’ve learned that no matter how much I wish my husband will change, he won’t. I’ve also learned that there is a huge difference between being a nag and asking for what I need. When I get super fucking frustrated, I sit him down and try to explain what I need and why. It doesn’t always work but it makes me feel better.
I want to get “me” back. I want to care. I guess I just want YOU to know that I totally feel you here. If you want someone to vent to who gets it….I am always just an email away!
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Wait – husbands can’t read minds? Gahhhhhh, now you tell Bossy…
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No makeup?!?! *gasp*
Okay, seriously, it’s great that you’re recognizing the signs and symptoms of your depression. That’s an important first step. Now you need to talk to somebody – you know, like your husband. Let him know that you’re feeling a little overwhelmed, and it would be nice if he would offer some help, because you’re not sure what you can and can’t ask him to do right now. As many others have pointed out, men don’t often know what’s going on unless you tell them. It’s not anything that’s wrong with them, that’s just the way they are. I often have the same issues with my boyfriend.
If venting here helps you, please continue to do so. It helps us know what’s going on (which is nice, because we’re not wondering and worrying), and it also might help you see things in a different perspective.
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seems to me britt has talked to him, has asked him to help, has requested specifically what she wants & needs. hence the “nagging” she doesn’t like to do.
so i say write a list. and just keep pointing to the fucker. or staple it to hubby’s chest.
maybe then he’ll retain the information.
:banghead:
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Sweetie, per my e-mail on Monday, I’m here if you need someone other than Avi or Mom to talk to. Now, that having been said, when I was going through my extreme grief/depression almost 10 years ago, going to the psychologist/counselor helped because she didn’t know me, didn’t know my history, was hearing all my shit fresh for the first time. That helped SO MUCH!
And, maybe the sit-down at the kitchen table, sans kids, for a serious talk about how this isn’t a “I’m extra-busy today, could you pick up the slack this afternoon” – that this is actually a, “I need long-term assistance from you and this will so help in my healing and get ME back.”
Anyhoo, that’s my two pennies. Love you, hon!
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Ugh…I’ve so been there. Sometimes, you just have to pull yourself back up because no one is gonna do it for you. No fun, I know…
Hang in there sweetie.
xo
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if i were there i’d take you out to some really fab bar, even if you were in your jeans and all, and we’d order really girly martini drinks like lemon drops or cosmopolitans and then we’d order all these egregiously high-calorie appetizers, and we’d eat and drink and eat and drink and eat and drink.
that is how women heal themselves.
*hugs*
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Poppy: you know what – I told myself I “can’t” leave for too long.
I can. I don’t because I don’t want to. I remembered this afternoon why. :hearbeat:
AmyD: this comment today may have very well saved a few lives. Mine, specifically.
usedtobeme: I am going to go to the doctor. I need to get myself back.
And I’m going to quit calling it nagging, too.
FlGrl: thanks
annie: everyone always told me to tell him. The part I missed was “tell him – again.”
Lynda: if I figure this all out then, I’ll let you know.
Finn: the chic in the frozen food aisle you mean? :whistle:
metalmom: 3 months!?!? Good God woman that is AWESOME!!
Hilly: sweetheart, I think the wanting is the first step. And I think we’re both going to be OK.
BOSSY: well Bossy’s husband probably does – SINCE BOSSY HAS MY DREAM LIFE!
Squeaky Wheel: “you’re not sure what you can and can’t ask him to do right now” – that’s a really great way of putting it. I need to remember that line.
hellohahanarf: yep, that’s exactly where the nagging comes from. I’m going to work on the “keep pointing” part.
But just in case, I have a stapler.
Coal Miner’s Granddaughter: “this isn’t a “I’m extra-busy today, could you pick up the slack this afternoon” – that this is actually a, “I need long-term assistance from you and this will so help in my healing and get ME back.””
Another really good line that I think might actually help him understand exactly what I’ve been asking for.
Kimberly: in other words, it’s time for the big girl panties – right?
Crys: how deliciously wonderful is it that that is SO true?
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I LOATHE the term “nag”.
If I ask you to do something and you agree, that should be the end of it. It should just get done.
If I ask you to do something and you agree, then forget and it doesn’t get done, it’s my fault for not reminding you.
If I ask you to do something and you agree, then don’t do it and I *DO* remind you, I am a nag.
If I ask you to do something and you agree, then don’t do it, and I remind you and you still don’t do it and I remind you again, then not only am I nagging, it starts a fight.
So I say…
If I ask you to do something, and you agree, that should be the end of it. It should get done.
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Can’t say anything that hasn’t been said…I’d go with the lists. Daily. Clearly spelled out. Let him know you’re doing this because you’re tired of hearing yourself ‘nag’. Use lipstick on your bathroom mirror – ‘hi hon, love you, now TAKE OUT THE FUCKING TRASH’. :thumbsup:
Prince is singing on my radio if it makes you feel better…
what do you mean you can’t hear my radio? shit
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First of all, Deanna is so fucking funny.
Second. I know what you mean. Jared and Bur are SO ALIKE – sweet Jesus!
Stage a little breakdown in front of him – works every time.
Good luck. If you need a coach, I’m here but somehow I think you’ll do just fine.
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Well…I think it is letting him off the hook to some extent to say that he is not equipped with those skills. Being in touch with your partner and being sensitive to their needs and moods is something that we are all capable of.
I am not the greatest husband in the world, but at least it’s not because I am not attentive to Mrs. Fab. When she hurts, I hurt. When she’s sick, I pick up the slack. And she does the same for me.
And let’s face it, she’s got the short end of the stick. I’m no day at the beach.
Hang in there, my friend.
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Damn – its like you looked into my mind and wrote all the things that I am feeling and are slowly dragging me under. :unsure: I’m here if you ever want to talk. Comiserate. Bawl.
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Like so many others, there’s probably nothing I can say that hasn’t been said. I am just amazed as I surf the interweb how many WOMEN specifically are breaking down right about now.
And actually, I shouldn’t be amazed, since we continue to bear the brunt of so much.
I went to my doctor today for what turned out to be stress and he said he sees more patients now for the same thing than any other time of the year. Go fig. :rolleyes:
I hope you feel better real soon.
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Oh honey. I’m so so very sorry. I’ve been exactly where you are. And it truly sucks.
I know you mentioned “doctor” and “medicine” and those are all good things. And yes, it’s good you know that he can’t fix it for you, that you have to do the actual work of getting better.
But it would be a hell of a lot easier if he would do some of the other work.
You have lots of offers above for support and I’ll add my voice to that crowd (even though you hardly recognize me around here.)
If you can, I suggest that you also call on help from people locally. If He won’t wrap presents, (or whatever) seriously I beg you…ask someone to come over and help you (and then let them do most of it.)
I know that feels like letting him off the hook, but really it’s asking for the help you need from a source (or sources) that will step up.
I suggest it not because I did it. But because I wish I had. Hoping that seeing it, he would then have realized how much I needed him to step up.
Oh dear. this is so long already.
Please, just do what you need to get taken care of. :heartbeat:
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I’m a guy (really!), and can offer this: Guys think different from girls. I hope this isn’t a shock, and by different I mean “what an alien way to look at that” different. Significantly to what we are asked to do, guys we tend to prioritize differently than gals. Before you complain about what he doesn’t do, ask if it whatever it is jeopardizes health, limb, eyesight or property. If not…that’s probably why he isn’t acting like it’s important.
Just because you think it is critical/important/significant doesn’t mean HE thinks it is, so the floor may not get vacuumed on Tuesday like you would do. (Most guys are willing to let little chores go for a while in favor of more pleasurable or relaxing activities.) And if HE doesn’t think it’s significant or urgent, he won’t remember it.
When you ask him to do things, stick to critical stuff…make sure the kids/pets get fed, make sure kids/pets get to school/activities/etc. on time, don’t let the dog crap on the floor…stuff like that. We aren’t going to get our drawers in a bunch over a dusty shelf, a nearly-but-not-quite full trash pail, or stuff like that.
If the kids/pets aren’t starving, are bathing occasionally, are getting to school, etc. then in his mind he IS helping. And if they are leaving you alone, then he’s trying to help you feel better…like a man would. If you want a back rub, try to remember that it’s foreplay to a guy brain…and frustration is to be avoided by a guy.
I’m not excusing anything, I’m just suggesting that (at least in his mind) he IS helping you. And anytime you act like he isn’t it feels like criticism, and you frustrate him and invalidate what he IS doing…which makes it hard to get him to do anything more or else. I’m going to guess that if you think back on his responses to your lists and requests, you’ll remember that he seemed surprised that you weren’t happy with what he HAD done, and frustrated that you wanted something different or more.
Hopefully this all makes something like sense and doesn’t sound like I’m dumping on you, because that certainly what I want to do. I really hope you are feeling better, and can figure out how to get a handle on this.
Cheers,
Chuck
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:what:
“Hopefully this all makes something like sense and doesn’t sound like I’m dumping on you, because that certainly :doh: ISN’T what I want to do. I really hope you are feeling better, and can figure out how to get a handle on this.”
Feel better, even if I can’t type a coherent sentence…
C
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At least you WANT to be saved.
There isn’t such a thing as “can’t” nor is there a “never”, because that would insinuate that something is “impossible”. Nothing is “impossible”. Impossible just takes a little longer.
Men reading the minds of women has been waited on for over 3,000 years so far… and it looks like we may have to wait awhile longer.
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When women ask men to do something and they don’t do it that sucks.
When women ask men to do something and they don’t do it AND they say they were never asked to do it?
:violent006:
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(Just sayin’.)
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I hate like hell that he doesn’t see you hurting and pick up the slack. Pick up a brick and throw it at his head. Okay, not really. Reading this, I felt like I wanted his email address so that I could email him and tell him exactly what you need from him and why. You know I know. I know. I know exactly where you are speaking from. I have been/am there. I am also here (you can almost always find me on gmail) if you need to vent/cry/talk/whatever. I mean it.
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The way you’re feeling is just how I felt the entire summer of 2006. I finally stopped expecting Geek to understand and realized I had to be very blunt about what was happening to me.
Ask him again. Tell him again. It’s not nagging. And then, like Amy said, check out. Lie on the couch or in your bed or tune out with music or a book if you have the energy. Either things will get done, or they won’t, but you’ve made your feelings known. I guarantee you he will make sure your babies are taken care of; the rest can wait. You need to take care of you. He will step up, but you have to tell him. And he certainly won’t do it as well as you would, but that’s okay. Get yourself back to yourself, and then go from there. One day at a time, baby.
Now that you’ve gotten a shit-load of advice you didn’t ask for, let me say this: Love ya’! :hug:
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To me? I’m reading a lot of women whose taste in men pretty much sucks.
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:what: Don’t hold back, RW, tell us how you REALLY feel!!! :cheesy:
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So true that men are simple creatures: ha!
But it was a good day when I discovered that beyond just doing something nice, the back/foot massage is the best investment I can make :thumbsup:
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No one has brought up the other side of the coin. The TOO attentive husband. If I even look REMOTELY sad, angry, etc. it’s..”what’s wrong?” Nothing, honey (there’s really not!) “Are you okay?” (YEEEEESSS!) “Well, you seem like something’s wrong..do you want to talk?” (NOOOOOOOOO!There’s nothing wrong) “oh, well, let me know if you need anything.” (ok honey…) “I cleaned the fridge, raked the leaves, polished the car, did all the laundry, and fixed you dinner” (oh, thank you honey. I ate a late lunch though..I’m not hungry and just need to catch up on some paperwork.) “You’re not hungry?? Is something wrong? Do you feel okay?? Is there anything I can do??” (NOOOOOOOOO….I’m.Just.Not.Hungry.It’s that simple honey” MY GOD IT’S EXHAUSTING!!! Iknow, Iknow..I’m soooo lucky…bla..bla…but..I think that trying incessantly to make someone happy who’s really already happy and trying to fix things that aren’t broken is just as maddening as someone who doesn’t do anything unless asked. :banghead:
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Wow, RW. What AmyD said. So, you’re all that and a bag of chippies and we should all be fawning over you. I see, I see.
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RW is all that and a bag of chips!
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Chippies (chipmunks? yup)!!!
I believe that. That’s why there aren’t any ?s in my comment.
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I was just noticing the dumpfest that developed and a lot of generalizing “men are” “men aren’t” stuff too. “Men” in general shouldn’t get the blame just because some people hooked up with assholes.
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A lot of men ARE assholes (want to meet my ex?) :what:
A lot of women are, too.
imagine that
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I gotta disagree with that, RW. Someone may be an asshole when it comes to reading other people… which also means they are dead money at the poker table… but they may be the sweetest person in the world when it comes to cooking dinner.
The truth is that men in general are assholes.
Just as women in general are bitches.
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RW, you get no argument from me. We make our choices about who we’re with and then we make our choices about what to do when we realize things aren’t exactly how we’d like them to be. I appreciate your honesty in the matter, and your defense of Men. (For real.)
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BITCHES. Yeah. That’s the word.
thanks Dawg. :clap:
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Wow, that’s so charming, Dawg!
I still agree with RW. To generalize that men are assholes and women are bitches (I soooooo hate that) is to remove the individuality of each person’s situation.
I am not a bitch, but I can be bitchy. I am not an asshole but I can be asshole-y.
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Whew.
First – I think RW is right in that a lot of time men as a whole get a bad rap for one guy being stupid.
I also think that there is some truth to the idea that in general men and women are wired differently. And thank God for that otherwise what is the point? Surely there is more interesting things that separate us than mere anatomy.
That being said – in a lot of ways my husband does need to grow up. And I need to ask. And ask, and ask, and ask, and ask – if that’s what it takes.
And while there are times when a woman might be beating her head against the wall trying to make a pig sing and you’d swear to God it’s just not worth it anymore… this is not one of those times.
There are a lot of things he does really well. But the absolute BEST thing he does is hear me when I say “look, you/me/we need to work on this. This isn’t working.”
When a man says to you “I was thinking last night and this morning about our marriage…” – it’s worth it to keep asking.
And finally – I hate to group respond like this because it doesn’t tell you each enough how much every comment means. Every single one of you – I appreciate you taking the time to add your 2 cents. And more.
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:heartbeat:
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I just want to note here that my comment to RW was meant in a supportive way. I actually thought it was a pretty cool comment.
And, I agree with his later comment as well as Britt’s response too.
Not all guys are bad… and even Britt’s guy isn’t THAT bad, he just needs a little supervision, direction, and maybe the working end of a cattle prod. :lmao:
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Britt, for some stupid reason, I can’t pull up your blog at my work, damn firewall! ANYWAY…your post sooooo needs to be published in some magazine!! This hits the head on the nail for a lot of husbands out there. You summed up the male human race perfectly.
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:banghead:
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Oh yeah, almost forgot: Ms.Britt made a deal about giving anything to know what her hubby thinks. Jeff Foxworthy WAS NOT JUST DOING COMEDY: WE (MEN) AREN’T THINKING ANYTHING. REALLY! That’s why your hubby makes it home and plops on the couch and veg’s no matter what’s on fire.
Oh yeah again: DON’T SPEAK IN CODE. Although I’m an electrical engineer, I COMPLETELY MISS THE MOST OBVIOUS AND REPEATED “BETWEEN THE LINES” SMOKE SIGNALS MY WIFE USED TO CONTINUALLY SEND ME. SAY IT: COMPLETELY BLUNT, ASSUME ***NOTHING*** IS UNDERSTOOD EXCEPT THAT (make sure it’s face to face or during quality time: full attention is otherwise not assured).
Last thing: NYCWD – while I used to be there, could’t disagree more; I found the reality I made is the one I live in: piss her off, I live in hell. Treat her special, I become valued. Try it, you’ll like it
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That’s funny, I have no problem actually listening to my wife and understanding and even anticipating her.
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Really? You seem clever enough… maybe you really have overcame the testosteral fog and are able to clearly read between the lines of feminine communication. :what: Would your wife agree? :unsure:
My friends share the same ailment. It’s not that we can’t catch any balls, but we’re dropping a lot (more like getting clocked) by most. :dunno: Women seem to offer items up to just below impendending violence just more and more cryptically. Guess this is their way of avoiding directness. Except at that point I’m taking the ostrich approach think the hail storm will soon pass by. :surrender:
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Ha! Nooooooooooo! Big girl thongs, my sweet
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