Fuck you. Yes, you.

by Miss Britt on November 7, 2007

I have fifty fucking ideas for posts rattling around in my head.

divx real mccoy the One of them involves pictures of my talking fat rolls.

I wonder if that’s really a good idea.

Unfortunately, I have PMS.

Which means I can’t fucking concentrate on anything long enough to put together a truly brilliant post.

Except for PMS.

I could write a fucking novella on PMS.

And also about hate.

And comments that piss me the fuck off.

And blogger envy.

But PMS gets old.

Because either you’re a guy and you don’t care.

(and I hate you right now)

Or you’re a woman - and, well, you’re understandably not impressed.

Do you think motherfuckers is less offensive if it’s written “mutherfuckers”?

It’s fucking cold here.

No, really, it is. It’s like 55 fucking degrees here until noon.

Yes I KNOW it’s colder where you - but I moved here for the HEAT.

Clearly I need to move to the Bahamas or Jamaica.

I hear weed is good for PMS.

I’m getting my hair cut and dyed and my eyebrows done tonight.

I’m scared shitless because it’s a new place and my hair is really easy to fuck up.

I had an awesome idea for a book last night when I couldn’t sleep.

Unfortunately, all I remember is that it was awesome.

Which is probably for the best - I don’t have the time for that shit right now anyway.

Which is a lie. We all have the same amount of time.

I just don’t have the energy.

    Blech.

    Psst... thanks for stopping by! I hope I didn't traumatize you too badly on your first visit. Remember to subscribe to my RSS feed if you want updates from the site!

    Posted in uncategorized

26 Comments so far

  1. t November 7, 2007 9:36 am

    i’m kind of scared to write anything. :wink:

    Reply

  2. avitable November 7, 2007 9:47 am

    You should just walk over, punch your boss in the nuts, and go home for the day.

    Reply

  3. Mom November 7, 2007 9:57 am

    Ah baby. 800 mg of Ibuprofen and 1 mg of Ativan and you sleep long enough and wake up fuzzy enough to not be exactly sure what it was you were incensed about.

    I love you and I can’t wait to see your hair and eyebrows.

    ANd I vote no for the fat rolls photo shoot.

    Reply

  4. hellohahanarf November 7, 2007 10:03 am

    personally i think motherfuckers is more offensive if it’s written “mutherfuckers”. MUCH more offensive. but that is just me.

    i vote yes for talking fat rolls. that has serious comedic potential.

    but since i can so sympathize with your pms issues, i say whatever you say. yep, i agree with it all. sorry you are feeling so blechie.

    :hug:

    Reply

  5. ADW November 7, 2007 10:07 am

    Do you know why they call it PMS?

    Cuz Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

    Bwa ha ha ha. I hate PMS and men and cows and new hairdressers and assholes. I’m with Avi, punch your boss in the balls and call it a day.

    Reply

  6. Nina November 7, 2007 10:07 am

    Write a post about all the comments you hate and why. That’s always fun.

    Reply

  7. Hilly November 7, 2007 10:11 am

    I’m not scared! I love this post because I could have written the same exact shit today…and yesterday…and probably tomorrow.

    Reply

  8. themuttprincess November 7, 2007 10:24 am

    I think that most people do not realize what a serious medical condition PMS is. Really. I think women should be allowed to just about do anything they please and just get off with a slap on the wrist when they have PMS. Hormones are a BITCH!

    Reply

  9. RW November 7, 2007 10:50 am

    It’s slow drivers that toast my nuts…

    Reply

  10. Mom November 7, 2007 11:06 am

    You know - I’ve been thinking about this whole PMS thing - and obviously I have it too right now.

    But it’s a natural deal, right? It’s hormones trying to turn the Titanic on a dime and I wonder just when it became this huge THING immortalized in story and song and Jeff Foxworthy jokes.

    Maybe there’s some biological basis for it that was needed at one time in our evolution - like fight or flight, and therefore, no, women are NOT nuts and we DON’T have to apologize for it and medicate ourselves out of it.

    Maybe it’s not “Oh you’re so sweet normally except when you have PMS” like it’s a flaw, but rather PART of who we are - valid feelings with just a little more oomph behind expressing what we normally bite our tongues at.

    And maybe there is a genetic reason to love carbs and M&M’s at that time.

    In other words, BACK OFF.

    Reply

  11. AmyD November 7, 2007 11:08 am

    Ditto your mom on everything.

    And, uh… hmm. I’ve got nothing. Ooo, except I totally agree with Avi, you should punch your boss in the junk and go home.

    And, if you do… take video.

    Reply

  12. Miss Britt November 7, 2007 11:09 am

    t: smart man, smart man. ;-)

    avitable: oh I will. At some point. You will not know the hour… but you can count on the day.

    Mom: is this why you didn’t “call right back” this morning - or a suggestion?

    hellohahanarf: I would like to hear an explanation on mutherfuckers being more offensive. Please.

    ADW: excellent advice as always!

    Nina: yeahhhh… I’m pretty sure that one would FINALLY bring on the hate mail.

    Hilly: I :hearbeat: you for not being scared of me. I hate when people are scared of me during PMS!! Chickens!!!

    themuttprincess: and there is no Midol for the hormonal/emotional roller coaster part. That sucks.

    RW: and old slow drivers are the worst.

    Reply

  13. DeannaBanana November 7, 2007 11:53 am

    I might almost pay money to watch you punch your boss in the nuts and then ask for the rest of the day off. Almost.

    Reply

  14. gtboat November 7, 2007 12:36 pm

    I vote for the fat rolls also :dazed:

    Sorry you feel like killing someone today. Glad Avi is closer to you than me. If you punch your boss in the nuts and go home I am sure he will understand. We men all understand PMS…

    Reply

  15. NYCWD November 7, 2007 12:39 pm

    I agree with Avi.

    I say make it today.

    Reply

  16. Usedtobeme November 7, 2007 1:05 pm

    I wanna know who has blog envy?

    Reply

  17. Kimberly November 7, 2007 4:45 pm

    Rx: Have a bottle of wine and then you can add hangover to your list of woes tomorrow. You’ll think less about the cramps when your head is pounding and you keep throwing up a little in the back of your throat.

    Works every time…

    Reply

  18. themuttprincess November 7, 2007 5:08 pm

    No we just have to suffer through. And of course, make everyone else suffer along with us!!!

    Reply

  19. BOSSY November 7, 2007 5:55 pm

    t’s comment cracked Bossy way up!

    Reply

  20. hellohahanarf November 7, 2007 6:00 pm

    my logic is simple. motherfucker is classic. mutherfucker is wannabe ghetto. and anything wannabe is offensive to me.

    said my logic was simple, not necessarily that anyone would agree with me.

    p.s. if i don’t say it enough…i love britt’s mom! :heartbeat:

    Reply

  21. Rich | Championable November 7, 2007 9:59 pm

    Motherfucker is totally classier than mutherfucker.

    I read “blech” as “belch.” I think you should have ended your post with “belch.”

    I dunno.

    Reply

  22. hellohahanarf November 8, 2007 8:22 am

    rich…loven you. i say classic, you say classy. and for some reason this morning that is cracking me up. thanks!
    :dance:

    hey britt, how are you feeling today?

    Reply

  23. Trish K November 8, 2007 10:01 am

    I think you should continue showing appropriate love to your boss…

    And yes, it is freaking cold here!! I actually had to turn on the heat in the house!!

    Reply

  24. Miss Britt November 8, 2007 10:51 am

    DeannaBanana: clearly your husband is the one to price gouge for cheap entertainment. ;-)

    gtboat: so that’s, um, what 2 votes for fat, 2 votes for mystique - right?

    NYCWD: LOL

    Usedtobeme: Me! I have blog envy of all the people who are kicking ass!

    Kimberly: physically I’m fine - no cramps yet - don’t get bloating - just the emotional roller coaster to HELL!!!

    themuttprincess: misery PPF’s company.

    BOSSY: what about ME Bossy?!! *WAH!*

    hellohahanarf: duly noted, motherfucker.

    Rich: my belching has become rather notorious.

    hellohahanarf: *sigh* well….

    Trish: I am refusing to backdown on the heat. It is FLORIDA!! Damn it!

    Reply

  25. Poppy November 8, 2007 7:12 pm

    “I hear weed is good for PMS.”

    Are you looking for a pot dealer through your blog?!?? :lmfao:

    Reply

  26. Miss Britt November 8, 2007 8:04 pm

    Why, do you know one?

    Reply

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