I finally made the time to get a pedicure Monday. A much needed, first of the season, way past due pedicure. And the only place to get a decent pedicure out here in BFE is from the little Korean women. Technically, you pay the angry Korean man who writes down your name, hands you off to one of the little worker bees, and goes back to sitting on his ass and “watching over” the place like some kind of villain in a slave trading movie.
But I digress.
I’m sitting in my massage chair (which is the absolute best part of the $20 pedicure) waiting my turn (because they never tell you there will be a wait, they simply sit you down, stick your feet in water, and by the time you notice there’s only one person working and four of you sitting with feet in water… well, your feet are in water). I’m looking around the room nervously, biding my time and wishing for once there was some chatty English speaking women in there. Just once I’d like to get the same kind of conversation in a nail salon that I get in my hair salon.
ANYway, I’m looking around - la tee da - and I notice that the woman sitting on the little pedicurist (oh fuck me I don’t know what they’re called, ok?) stool is wearing a dress. And she’s sitting directly in front of us, straddling her little stool.
Um, okay. Odd. It didn’t appear to be a long dress and she certainly wasn’t going out of her way to be discreet. I’m sitting there thinking that maybe she’s so used to doing it she can do this in just about anything and be comfortable and casual and I am obviously just being very silly and American or something.
And oh my God I think I just saw a flash of flesh.
Was it? Did I just see flesh up there? Is it? Oh my God is that old Korean Woman Vagina!!??
Look away, Britt, look away. Just… focus on the art. And the silk flowers. And the, uh - well SHIT, is this woman wearing underwear or not?!
It was driving me absolutely crazy. I looked back a few times, trying to see if I could casually catch another glimpse. And it shouldn’t have been difficult, what with all the spreading and straddling and flashing. And…
Oh my God Britt you are trying to look up this woman’s dress!!!
I suddenly became aware of the thoughts racing through my head and the planning and the uncomfortable crook in my neck from trying to “look natural”. And I’m almost certain I blushed, right then and there. I mean really, how low have I come in my life when I am trying to sneak a peak up a poor old woman’s dress?!
I feel so dirty. And pervy. And… do they make rehab facilities for pervy 20 something year old women?
I should ask Avi. If anyone would know, it would be him.
(and, by the way, white, with little bows, definitely underwear - in case you were wondering, I’ll save you a seat at the next meeting)
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I am SO glad I found you!
May 15th, 2007 at 4:24 am
lol.why you little….:twisted:
i am laughing so hard.but we all get those pervy moments.it’s called curiosity.so dont be too hard on yourself.
:grin::grin::grin:
May 15th, 2007 at 4:45 am
Yeah, I’d totally look up the dress too.
May 15th, 2007 at 5:48 am
My pervy moment is when I check out girls asses and then I’m so nervous thinking someone saw me.
Oh well!
May 15th, 2007 at 6:02 am
In fact, they do. At Avitable’s House of Wayward Girls, we treat the affliction of perversion in girls aged 15-35.
Our method is unique - desensitization. By prohibiting clothing and encouraging pillow fighting and sexual exploration, along with ’special’ visits to the headmaster’s office, we throw so much perversion at these young girls that they can’t help but get sick of it!
No uggos please.
May 15th, 2007 at 6:10 am
Snorting coffee out of my nose. You owe me a new keyboard, pervy!
May 15th, 2007 at 6:27 am
LMAO!!! “Oh my God is that old Korean Woman Vagina!!??” Classic. Thanks for the laugh!
Unfortunately, I think that I would have had to do the same if I had been there. Curiosity would have killed me (or gotten me kicked out of the pedi-shop).
May 15th, 2007 at 6:39 am
LMAO…..Only you! I am sur ethat I would have done the same thing. Only for something to talk to people about though!
May 15th, 2007 at 7:00 am
Oh good Lord now I can’t go to the Korean women for a pedicure - and I was just thinking it would be nice. Straddling indeed!
May 15th, 2007 at 7:00 am
I feel so much more normal now.
May 15th, 2007 at 7:06 am
On Saturday, my pedicurist was a man. I avoided looking at his crotch completely. All I could think was that he had a foot fetish. I hope he was wearing panties.
May 15th, 2007 at 7:54 am
I do it too. AND I’m guilty of checking it out when boobilage is on display.
I feel so much better now. Thanks.:wink:
May 15th, 2007 at 8:24 am
Antipodeesse: you should know, I’ll want the side by the wall. Thanks for stopping by!
Maisha: I’m Catholic, “hard on yourself” is what we DO
heather: well we all know YOU’RE a whore :roll:
:razz:
Peggy: that’s not pervy, that’s sizing up the competition and therefore completely acceptable
avitable: will this be covered by my insurance?
Wicked H: deal - but first you owe me a weekend of SPAing!!
Angel: I just know something like “Is that Old Korean Woman Vagina?” is going to end up on my tombstone some day.
Kristin: oh shut up, you know you would have been checking her out for a “swap” meet. :twisted:
Mom: sure you can - you’ll fit right in honey!! :mrgreen:
Michael Thomas: I’m starting to think that may be my calling in life, to make others feel better about themselves. By comparison.
Mist 1: I don’t let a man touch my toes unless I’m planning on sleeping with him.
:shock: Oh, er, um, so…
Manic Witch: that will be $35 please.
May 15th, 2007 at 8:32 am
Yes, but only if you let me touch your toes.
May 15th, 2007 at 8:51 am
Brit I love you. You make the rest of us look almost normal :mrgreen:
May 15th, 2007 at 9:11 am
I’m with manic. I can’t help it! It helps me be more forgiving when I catch people looking at mine though.
Sometimes I come across pervy because I am checking out an outfit. Could really care less what is under there.
May 15th, 2007 at 9:22 am
It’s pretty much a no win situation.
Can’t look. Must look.
May 15th, 2007 at 9:36 am
Dear Miss Britt,
Now look what you’ve done! You’ve gone and inspired a fabulously pervie post by my Close, Personal Friend, the world famous Ms. Mac.
Read it here: http://ms-mac.blogspot.com/2007/05/my-short-short-story-anthology.html
May 15th, 2007 at 9:41 am
If only we could get pedicures together and then go out for drinks after and discuss what we shouldn’t have been looking at! :shock: :twisted:
May 15th, 2007 at 10:46 am
PERVERT!
May 15th, 2007 at 10:48 am
LOL! Good thing you didn’t fall off your chair or anything!
May 15th, 2007 at 10:52 am
OMG. :shock: ROTFLMFAO!:lol:
I love you!!!!!
You. kill. me.
May 15th, 2007 at 11:06 am
She was wearing underwear? Well, that’s good. If she didn’t want you looking she shouldn’t have worn a dress and spread her legs for you.
May 15th, 2007 at 11:52 am
Britt, you were NOT the only person looking. I know, because that is just human nature… To seek and find answers… Especially important ones like whether an old Korean woman was wearing any underware.
May 15th, 2007 at 12:11 pm
Oh good gawd, I would have done the same but I would have probably pointed it out to her so she would cover that shit up!
May 15th, 2007 at 1:03 pm
I totally would have looked. Then I probably would have told her I could see her undies. That is after the pedicure so I wouldn’t have to sit embarrassed the whole time she’s rubbing my toesies.
May 15th, 2007 at 1:19 pm
Looks like I’m the only one here who has actually seen old Korean woman vagina then, I take it?
It’s nothing, really. I just suddenly have a taste for tacos…
May 15th, 2007 at 2:02 pm
RW-Ewwww.
May 15th, 2007 at 2:52 pm
much like my “clitoris” issue with home depot…I blushed and I was only on the phone!
May 15th, 2007 at 4:40 pm
Britt - You love that I’m a whore :razz:
May 15th, 2007 at 5:49 pm
Bossy doesn’t like The Massage Chair. It makes her feel as though angry little people are poking through the back headrest.
May 15th, 2007 at 6:03 pm
Crap Britt! I have a pedi appointment on Thurs- she better not be Korean!
May 15th, 2007 at 6:16 pm
Holy SHIT you people come out of the woodwork for Vaginas!!!
avitable yes, but only if you paint them
J.: I know. Paris and I have that in common.
ginamonster: oooh I totally do that too!!
Championable: yeah, and I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or disappointed to discover the white panties with bows…
Antipodeesse: I should be sure to tell them about my inspiration fee. (thanks for passing the word, btw!)
AmyD: I KNOW!!!!!! Although, we both know you’d never be able to pencil me in. :twisted:
webmiztris: hey, some of us gotta dig a little deeper for excitement, ok? :mrgreen:
Tallyho_2022: I know, because THAT would have been just rude.
sam: your honor, he means that purely hypothetically, this is not a pattern, I swear.
Poppy: I know, seriously, more woman need to practice good old fashion decency! Hmph!
themuttprincess: so what you’re saying is, I am never alone?
Delite: well, ya know, I wanted to be polite.
Brandi: is it a mere coincidence you have the same name as my SIL?
Please God, tell me this is a coincidence and people will not be quoting my Vagina stories at family dinners.
RW: ah, life on the road…
Manic Witch: LOL
Evanzstox: my clitoris makes me blush sometimes too
heather: am I that obvious? I really need to work on this whole “coy” thing
BOSSY: I imagine little asian women walking on me, actually
Does that make me racist?
May 15th, 2007 at 6:22 pm
No Comment, thats right, no comment, can not, and will not go there. Would have paid top dollar to watch you trying to sneak a peek at a,,,, well you know, but nope, out of my love and respect for you little lady, I can not go there. But I am laughing my sweet little ass off as I type.:shock::oops::wink:
May 15th, 2007 at 8:32 pm
If it didn’t involve airplanes I’d pencil you in RIGHT NOW!
May 15th, 2007 at 8:38 pm
i kind of had an experience like that once that involved the make up artist wearing a really uneven push up bra. we all look, don’t feel bad.
May 15th, 2007 at 10:48 pm
I hope you tipped her well!:lol:
May 16th, 2007 at 2:03 am
Also, I TOLD YOU!!!! about the vagina thing!!!! Ha Ha!
May 16th, 2007 at 2:06 am
OMG you were trying to look at old Korean snatch? The hell is WRONG with you?
May 16th, 2007 at 2:36 am
Bwahahahaha, I guess that coúld be considered pervy. Don’t go into rehab, though. That would be such a waste of a wonderful trait.
And the answer to the title of your posts is: NO
BTW: What is the use of wearing underwear while having a pedicure anyway?
May 16th, 2007 at 6:23 am
Ok, so I guess I am now officially a perv too. I look at other chick’s cleavage (it’s like the sun you know you shouldn’t but can’t help it). And yes I would have had to verify that there were undies. I blurted out in my Anatomy of all places one day “now why can’t my ass look like hers?” Of course I was sitting with my friends so it wasn’t too bad. They know I’m wild, but it was still funny for the eavesdroppers. Oh well, Fuck em if they can’t take a joke!
May 16th, 2007 at 6:30 am
Terry: you don’t think vaginas are funny? :shock: :twisted:
AmyD: damn you and your won’t leave the housedness!!!
Amanda: ooh, I want a makeup artist
chlorinejenny: I did, actually, 20%
Kentucky Girl: there are many theories
Gabrielle: OMG - “fuck ‘em if they can’t take a joke” is like our family motto!! Most especially, my husband’s. Where did you hear that!??!
May 16th, 2007 at 7:30 am
LMAO that IS pervy! Don’t go into rehab though. Such a waste of a wonderful trait! :razz:
And the answer to the question in your title? Neva! No such thing!
May 16th, 2007 at 11:26 am
I’m pretty sure Mama-san was coming on to you.
May 16th, 2007 at 1:05 pm
About 15 years ago my ex and I used to say it all of the time. He started me on it. He was from NJ.
May 16th, 2007 at 3:21 pm
Yeah, coinsidence. I’m in Why OH! ming.
May 16th, 2007 at 4:52 pm
Britt-
The Above Evanzstox post was not me, I am the real Evanzstox. The post is linked to my site. Would you be so kind to email me or forward any info you have regarding the phantom poster? I am curious to see who is disguising themselves as me. If you have the IP address that would be great. Thanx you’re a peach.
May 25th, 2007 at 10:45 pm