Have I mentioned that I’m considering leaving behind the cold Iowa winters and small town living and taking a job in Orlando? (Oh, Britt, dahling, that sounds simply MAHvelous) Yeah. Have I also mentioned that I’m considering packing up my entire family of four, including two children, and moving them 1,401.59 miles away from their friends and family and everything they’ve ever known in the whole world ever to be completely alone? No? Did I forget to mention that?
Well, allow me to do so now.
I’m still in the “consideration” phase. Wherein 99.9% of the time “consideration” is code for “Holy Crap When Can I Move Already!!??”
But then there’s the .01%. Like today. When the sun was out and bright and I drove my son to soccer practice. And dropped him off. And left. Because you can do that in a town where you know every single ever living soul.
I pulled away and rolled down the window and turned up the radio. Country. Because country music makes you smile and sway and the sky seem clearer on just the right sunny spring afternoon. I noticed how much green there was, everywhere. We have yards here. And trees. And bushes. And no one waters them or worries about draughts or heat resistance or… anything. The grass dies in the winter and grows in the spring. Just because that’s what grass does.
I whipped through a neighborhood I could navigate with my eyes closed. Except it’s not just a neighborhood, it’s an entire town of familiarity. On every street, I passed a house with a recognizable car in the driveway. I wondered what she was doing at her mother-in-laws at this time of day, and if he was going to sit out there chatting with the landscapers all night.
It’s small. And it’s dull. And it’s severely lacking in fine shopping and vast culture. But… it’s home.
And it’s been home, for 15 years now. I may not be able to find a sale on designer handbag’s within 100 miles of here - but I can find a shoulder to lean on in a crisis in 30 seconds flat. And a sitter. And a hand up. And a nostalgic story about how cool we all used to be…
Can I really walk away from this? Can I take my kids from the only comfort and stability and security that I’ve ever known?
I know this place. I know these people. And they’re good, really GOOD, people. They live and they die and they go about their business just doing the best that they can. And most of them may not ever see their name in lights, or print. But they matter, just the same. And they have the ability to make an amazing impact on the lives of my kids… if I let them.
THIS is what I know. And I curse it. And I resent it. And sometimes it smothers me with it’s sameness. But sometimes I wonder if there is anyway I could ever leave it behind.
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Posted in It's All About Me, just rambling













If you have those 99.9% you should follow your gut. You’ll always regret what if, if you don’t.
You are blessed in that so many people don’t appreciate the good things about we’re they’ve lived for years….until they leave. I’ve moved a lot. I’ve found home now and I’m staying. Are you home yet ?
I’ve lived in small towns, as well as big cities, New York, L.A., ATL, and now Singapore. I’m not going to lie to you, it is hard as hell living away from family and friends sometimes. However, somehow we’ve made very special friends in each place who have become our family. It takes time for that to happen, but having children helps because they force you into new situations, and kids are usually uninhibited about making new friends when they’re quite young. It’s a big decision, but we’ve never regretted it! :smile:
Um. Avitable lives in Orlando. There’s a babysitter AND a shoulder to cry on right there!
Of course, allowing Avitable to have influence over your children may not be the smartest move…
:razz:
I don’t think it would be wise to give all of that up just to move to Orlando to become Avi’s full-time ho. He can pimp you out just fine where you are now.
OHGAWDNO! How could I have forgotten about Avi living in Orlando :shock:
Who would want to hire you? You’re just a cute little blonde mommyblogger! From Iowa! Who thinks filet mignon has to be wrapped in bacon and have a toothpick in it!
Well, whoever this sucker is, hopefully he hasn’t already established a pattern of continuing sexual harassment by asking to see your boobs. Or by calling you a whore.
And hopefully he knows how hard it would be and doesn’t ply you with drinks and professional spa services and shoes this weekend when you’re visiting, in hopes that you’ll just stay.
franky: yeah, the what if’s are what haunt me.
The Cat: I wish I knew…
Geeky Tai-Tai: thank you!!
Dave2: I think he actually offered to change diapers once too.
Denise: Yeah, but a good ho needs a year round tan, don’t ya think??
Geeky Tai-Tai: I don’t know, because he ends almost all of his posts with “btw, I live in Orlando and it’s warm here, fuck you yanks.”
avitable : :oops: :razz:
Baby, nothing is permanent, ya know. If you were to move there, and it didn’t work out, who’s to say you couldn’t come home? You’d probably lose points in the whole “I’ve lived here and my family has too for 20 generations” thing but you kind of started out at a disadvantage there anyway. :roll:
I’m having similar issues. I’m also about to move to Florida… not Orlando, but it’s still 1500 miles away from home. And while my boyfriend will have family there, I will not. No friends, no family, nobody to turn to. I’m hoping and praying that once I get there I’ll make friends. And I’m hoping that those friends will be the type that you feel like you’ve had forever, even though you’ve only known them a short time. I’m also hoping that since I’m doing the opposite move you are - from city to country - that I’ll be able to handle the slower pace in my new life.
Allyson, my first big move on my own was when I was 18. I moved from Indianapolis (not really a big city) to a small farming/coal mining town of 4,000 people in Illinois (definitely a small town). This little town was my boyfriend’s hometown. I didn’t know a soul, and everyone knew him and his family.
My biggest problems living in a small town? Lack of anonymity and EVERYONE is related to SOMEONE. You’ll be OK as long as you keep your mouth shut for at least a year and learn who is related to whom.
Oh yeah, we’ve been married 29 years. Just sayin…
Britt, trust me hardly anyone has that many times screwed a great job or general life situation to follow his guts as I have.
And you know that I am bound to do it again, but exactly twice I didn’t follow the what ifs… and I still regret it.
Besides that, there is already a social environment awaiting you. You are not going to just a new job. What would one want more?
Mom: I know, I know. But I don’t want to come back a failure either, ya know?
Allyson: I suppose it’s an adjustment either way -
Geeky Tai-Tai EXCELLENT advice :-D
franky: true, true
Your mother makes some solid points there, Brittini. The what ifs can be a real killer. Nothing is permanent… and, I’d totally make Avi babysit because he needs to nurture his deep down desire to procreate. He just doesn’t know it yet.
I don’t need to nurture shit.
And I’m a great babysitter. I’ve changed many diapers, too.
Only people like the “Snake-fucking” dude would actually need to nurture shit. whew!
FOLLOW your heart.
Did you read your own post??? Do you know how many people would kill for the life you have? Also take a family vote. That sholud tell you something.
It is hard to up and move from a town where you know everyone and everyone knows you. I did it 2 years ago. I moved to another small town that I love, but I don’t really know people here, I cry often about how lonely I am. I worry because I am not making it here, not like I was back home, where I was hired based on my ability and being known by the person. Now I falter because I am unknown.
Moving has been the greatest challenge in my life, but it has also made me so much stronger and better. You will know what is right and I think you already do, follow your gut, you can always move back home if you need to. :)
AmyD: nothing is permanent - that needs to be my new mantra.
Avi: oh yeah, what are you doing on valentine’s day?
Geeky Tai-Tai : well avi is a little ‘off’
themuttprincess: well my HEART says I should give it all up and run to LA to be FAMOUS!!!! But my stretch marks say, come up with a plan B.
greg t: Yeah, I do know how many people would kill for my life. And do you know how crushing the weight of that guilt is when you know that everyone in the world wants your life… but you?
do you know what it feels like to feel like you’ve been dropped into the middle of someone’s paradise… and you don’t speak the language?
Deb: thanks for not being afraid to tell me about the hard parts… the potential down sides.
Apparently watching your kids! :mrgreen:
Damn those stretch marks!
Britt - this: “Yeah, I do know how many people would kill for my life. And do you know how crushing the weight of that guilt is when you know that everyone in the world wants your life… but you?
do you know what it feels like to feel like you’ve been dropped into the middle of someone’s paradise… and you don’t speak the language? ”
Says everything.
Start packing.
Wow… why in the hell would you want to leave IOWA? LOL… I love it here, but I know its not for everyone.
The same things you claim to LOVE about where you’re at, are what some people spend YEARS trying to find. You’re lucky, but you already know that.
BUT– if your present situation still doesn’t seem to “fit” try something different. Like everyone else has already said, you can always come back.
I could never imagine living in Iowa and enjoying it.
I’ve moved a bit over the last few years (not so much as intentional as life having its way with me) and, all in all, I think I am richer for it. Oh, it has taken a toll on us. But I think we are coming out ahead. But if I see another U-Haul I swear … erm, where was I. Oh yes. Good luck!
avitable: Sweet. Could you get me reservations somewhere nice as well, please and thank you?
themuttprincess: no shit!
AmyD: heh, how would you like to buy a four bedroom, two bathroom, newly updated house in BFE?
Blonde Chick: that’s what scares me, that i’ll run around in circles looking for something that’s been here all along. *sigh*
avitable: or listening to anything made before 1980. I know. The depth of you, I swear.
almost vegetarian: I don’t even want to THINK about the logistics of moving. Yuck.
Well, since you’re from Iowa, I imagine you just want the best table at Denny’s, right? :mrgreen:
Ummm, except that one of the bathrooms is in the basement. No thank you!
An important thing to consider is what it is you’re really looking for, and whether or not those things can ever be found in a place.
If you want to change your scenery, move to Orlando. If you want to change your life, change yourself.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t go. I’m just saying you should know why you’re going and what you expect to find.
Joe, you so smart!