Clusterfucked: Part 3

by Miss Britt on April 23, 2007

Today the Three Stooges are featuring a Round Robin of fiction.  Here’s how it works…

Read Part 1 of today’s story at Avitable’s blog.

then hop on over to read Part 2 at Amy’s Musings.

And then, and only then, you can read part 3 here.

No.  Seriously.  You have to go over to the other two blogs first or you will not be able to truly appreciate my brilliance.  And who wants that?

Did you do it?  Are you caught up?  Are you ready?

Clusterfucked: The End 

Fuck.”

Lynn slammed the book with next week’s scripts shut, utterly disgusted with her co-authors.

She stood up and began pacing back and forth across her carpet, mentally racing between fury and complete bewilderment.  What the hell where they trying to do to her?  Her team of writers were usually so reliable, so in tune with what she was thinking herself.  Surely they couldn’t have left her with this mess on purpose.

Or had they?

It was no secret that the adult film industry was extremely competitive.  Sure, you could turn out dime a dozen Suck N’ Fucks that were destined to end up in a bin full of VHS tapes in the sleazy back room of a Family Video.  That part was easy.

But they had always been better than that.  Lynn and her two partners were on the verge of establishing themselves as an empire in the industry – complete with accolades and awards and international distribution deals and, most importantly, money.  Lots and lots of money.

The success had always been so much sweeter because Lynn was able to share it with two women.  Men were always running the pornography industry, while women usually found themselves stuck in front of the camera.  But not these three.  Together Lynn and her partners had taken their experience as “actresses” and plowed it into a multi-million dollar production house.  They had become a well oiled machine.  Every project they had touched had been golden.

Until now.

Now her partners were sending her manuscripts with blood and guts and… action.  And not the kind of action their movies had become famous for.  Ninja rolls?  Daring freeway runs?  How in the hell did they expect Andy, their biggest male star, to pull this shit off?  Had they completely forgotten about the pages and pages of contracts they’d poured over together – all of which expressly stated that there would be no physical or strenuous activity?  Fuck.  Everyone in the industry knew that Andy Avitable was a lazy son of a bitch.  But they had to keep him around because, quite frankly, his was the most popular penis in town right now.

Andy would never go for this.  And her partners knew that.  They had to have.  Instinctively, Lynn knew that something was off.  This was more than just artistic expression and the opportunity to try something new.

The sick feeling in the pit of her stomach told her it was more.  This was personal.  This was a deliberate attempt to fuck her over.

Because this time, it was Lynn’s name on the line.  And most of her money.  She had pushed for the deeper plot.  She had wanted to take their films to the next level – a feature length with character development and actual cinematography.  And Amanda and Avril had gone along, eventually.  But only on the condition that Lynn took most of the risk, and all of the heat if it failed miserably.

In short, she was responsible for turning this murder mystery, blood soaked scene into something that would actually make people want to have sex.

“You can do this Lynn, you can do this.”  The mantra played over and over again as she stared at the blank page.  “You can do this…”

A flash.  Yes.  She could do this.  The idea was sketchy, but she could pull it off.  It would need work here, and more detail there.  The pieces of the story swirled around in her mind like brightly colored puzzle pieces and she plucked them from the air, fitting them together one by one as a larger picture formed.

Lynn sat down at her keyboard to write.  She could do this.  She could take an action flick and the premise for a who-done-it mystery and turn it into something purely pornographic.  Hell, she was famous for it!

As she stretched out her fingers over the keys, prepared to save her own ass, she chuckled to herself.  The solution was as old as sex itself…

“Sadie’s heart thumped.  She hadn’t been prepared for him to be so naked… or so… enticing.  Her breath quickened as she noticed the look on his face.  Men were so obvious, and predictable.  And he was no different.

It was clear – what with the nudity and all, and the ridiculous grin he was flashing her – her mark had a thing for women in authority.”

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26 Comments so far

  1. avitable April 23, 2007 6:42 am

    Very nice. I heard boomchickawowow music in my head while I read the last lines. :mrgreen:

    Reply

  2. Mr. Fabulous April 23, 2007 7:06 am

    Very cool. You guys should do stuff like this more often!

    Reply

  3. Paticus April 23, 2007 7:32 am

    Excellent. Very clever ending, Miss. Britt.
    As Avitable said, i could hear the porno bassline start up at the end.

    Reply

  4. WannaBeTanked April 23, 2007 7:53 am

    Make it stop! I can’t get the picture of a naked Avitable out of my head! Make it Stop!

    Reply

  5. Poppy April 23, 2007 8:42 am

    Andy Avitable, hehehehe. His total fantasy to be Ron Jeremy is complete! Nice job, Britt. You, Amy, and Avi need to write books together. For real. And do the internet show. And take over the world.

    Reply

  6. Kelly April 23, 2007 9:02 am

    Aw, what they hell?! You stopped right at the good part! Guess I’ll just have to finish it myself. I’ve got all kinds of good ideas along these lines. Of course, we are talking Avi here… so it might stretch the bounds of decency, but I’ll figure something out. Sort of Stephen King meets Nina Hartley. :shock: :eek::shock::eek:

    Reply

  7. Miss Britt April 23, 2007 9:30 am

    avitable: turn your radio down

    Mr. Fabulous: thanks :mrgreen:

    Paticus: well those two did go out of their way I think to give me something difficult to “wrap up”! lol

    WannaBeTanked: well as long as he’s already there… picture him skipping too. I think everyone should share in the emotional trauma.

    Poppy: lol, thank you – I figure since I refuse to show him my boobs, making him a pseudo porn star was the least I could do!

    Kelly: well I was given a “guideline” for how long it could be – and this is already about twice that!

    Reply

  8. themuttprincess April 23, 2007 9:41 am

    Very nice ending!

    Reply

  9. webmiztris April 23, 2007 9:46 am

    that was excellent, guys! I can hear the sexy porn music cueing up RIGHT NOW!

    Reply

  10. Poppy April 23, 2007 10:29 am

    You refused to show him your boobs and yet you’re going to show the rest of us? (At least that’s what HE said. :razz: ) I like how you smacked down the story into a script, totally JR!!!

    Reply

  11. Poppy April 23, 2007 10:43 am

    And this post plus sake bomb have forced me to add you to my Google feed reader so that I read you every day instead of just when Avi tells me to. So expect me to totally go nuts in your comments too, cuz I’m crazy.

    Reply

  12. AmyD April 23, 2007 10:44 am

    Wickedly BRILLIANT!!!!! The porn twist was PERFECT!!!!

    Reply

  13. Fogspinner April 23, 2007 11:05 am

    Awesome. You really should do this more often. Next time you get to start. Isn’t that how it works?

    Reply

  14. avitable April 23, 2007 11:24 am

    That’s not radio. That’s the video you and I made.

    Reply

  15. Meagan April 23, 2007 12:14 pm

    I definitely enjoyed the ending…very creative.

    Reply

  16. Joefish April 23, 2007 12:34 pm

    This is like a game of telephone. Bitch on a pension, suck my dong!

    Reply

  17. AmyD April 23, 2007 12:38 pm

    It just occurred to me, for being an innocent Catholic girl, you sure learned a lot about the porn industry in one weekend with Avi

    Reply

  18. avitable April 23, 2007 12:40 pm

    Well, that’s why her new nickname is DP Cumguzzler. :evil:

    Reply

  19. Miss Britt April 23, 2007 2:12 pm

    themuttprincess: thank you :mrgreen:

    webmiztris: maybe it’s time for me to look into an autoplay feature here…

    Poppy: yes, well, you have to keep Avi at bay a little or he just gets out of hand

    AmyD: thank you – the image of burning calves on a hot runner inspired me :wink:

    Fogspinner: next time I think I should insist on it! lol

    avitable: did you edit out your voice saying “i swear this pill will help your headache”?

    Meagan: thank you – I don’t get to be creative very often lately!

    Joefish: heh, so you weren’t impressed then?

    AmyD: well, to be fair, most of it I learned in the stack of required reading he sent home with me

    avitable: woah. no. i most certainly did not agree to cumguzzler. :shock:

    Reply

  20. avitable April 23, 2007 2:19 pm

    Of course I did. And when my voice says “Don’t worry about the fizzy drink – it’s just carbonation.”

    So Cumguzzler is out, but DP is okay? I’m fine with that.

    Reply

  21. Dragon April 23, 2007 3:16 pm

    Thanks for the great read!

    Reply

  22. themuttprincess April 23, 2007 3:33 pm

    You are certainly welcome. I really liked the turn you gave it at the end. I think your ending made the story work!!

    Reply

  23. Championable April 23, 2007 5:14 pm

    This is getting very advanced for me.

    Reply

  24. Jacki April 23, 2007 6:30 pm

    WOW. Good story the three of you. Totally didn’t expect the story to go the way you took it. Also didn’t expect you to go the porn route before Avi. Did you have a freaky friday experience while visiting him??

    Reply

  25. Michael April 24, 2007 8:37 pm

    That was great, plus I got three new blogs to peruse.

    Reply

  26. Blackblade April 25, 2007 10:28 am

    Very funny … kind of like Whose Line is it Anyway in prose.

    Good finish too … as I read down I was glancing at the scrollbar and thinking ‘how the hell does this get finished before the end of the page’ !

    Do more ! Please.

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Avitable » Week in Review I April 29, 2007 1:01 am

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