I finally broke down and made a MySpace page.  While I was fiddling around with the page for work, I discovered that “everyone” has a MySpace page.  Even grown ups.  Everyone, but me.

I’ve resisted the MySpace pull for this long because a) I’m not 12 and b) I’m not sure how gung ho I am about the idea of people who “know me” finding ways to get to “know me” better.  It’s really hard to keep your life neatly compartmentalized when you start throwing everything up on the Internet.

But then everyone in the office started gushing about “ooh - add me!!” and “ooh - I wanna be your friend!”  It was all quite childish and clique-like.  I could no loner resist.

So… I threw up my very own MySpace page and spent about 30 seconds trolling the Internet for people I’d be willing to add as friends.  I came up with three.  I’m not sure if that’s a reflection on me, or the Internet.

Anyway - my point.  I logged in the next morning and was screwing around there for a bit.  I noticed that there were tons and tons of ads.  The ads themselves didn’t surprise me - because, duh, it’s the Internet and it’s a free service.  What did surprise me was that they ALL seemed to be “gay/lesbian” ads.  Really, like 100% “he’s hot, he’s here, get into it” ads only.

Ever the marketer, I found myself wondering why MySpace seemed to be marketing exclusively to the gay and lesbian community - specifically, gays and lesbians who were apparently “desperate to find that special someone”.  I wondered what statistics would have led MySpace to believe that the majority of their users would respond to gay and lesbian ads.

And then I discovered something about myself.  It seems, I am a lesbian.

Well, at least, MySpace thought I was a lesbian.  I was pretty sure that I had set my profile up as “married/straight” originally.  But apparently, the all knowing MySpace robots were able to see past my cold exterior and facade of a family life.  My homepage now clearly stated that I was a lesbian.

I congratulated myself for a few moments on my own courage - coming out like that to the whole Internet.  I wondered how I would break the news to my husband…

…but the new-found liberation was brief as I quickly remembered my strong allegiance to the penis.  *sigh*

I switched back to “married, straight”.  The ads switched too, instantly.  I felt a little nostalgic for the old ways and a little shut out.  A part of me wished I could go back.  At least… back to the ads.  When I was a lesbian I was promised “openness” and “hotness”.

As a straight person, MySpace is only offering me free blinking cursors.  Oh, Joy.

Damn you penis!!

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