Sometimes I understand why “mommy bloggers” do it.

There are some moments when I get that feeling that the only thing in the entire world that really matters is being a mom. Once in a while, I am reminded.

I just put my daughter to bed. She’s about…mmm… 20 months now and she’s exhausting at least 50% of the time. She refuses to speak more than a handful of words. She does most of her communicating through sheer will power, screeching and ice cold glares.

Truth be told, she scares the shit out of me.

But tonight she reminded me how I wrong I was way back when I was scared to have a second child because I thought there was no way I’d ever be able to love a second child as much as I loved the first.

And it was nothing big. Really, it wasn’t anything I should even be attempting to post about.

We changed the diaper and zipped up her jammies. She hugged her bunny and grinned at me in that way that lights up her little eyes and puts color in her cheeks. When she smiles that way, her little chin juts out and she looks as if she is literally, physicaly, overflowing with delight.

I asked her if she was ready for bed and she nodded, grinning still. She lifted up her little arms to me, and I obediently picked her up and placed her in her crib. She giggled as I tucked her in and set her babies around her.

“Are you cold?” She nods, and I wrap an extra blanket around her. She smiles more, both of us pleased that at least for the moment we are understanding what one another.

Just before I pull up the crib rails, she looks up at me and puts her little lips together, “mmmmmmm”. So I kiss her. She smiles, and reaches her little arms out to me. So I hug her.

I pull up the rails and start to wind up her mobile, and she holds her bunny up to me. “mmmmmm” she says again.

“Bunny needs a kiss too?”

She nods and so of course, Bunny gets a kiss - and a hug. And she giggles so hard it shakes her whole body.

As I turn off the light I can’t help but smile. And for a moment I don’t care that she can’t say more than a handful of words. One of those words is “mama” and at least for tonight, the joy she gets in saying it is enough.

Sometimes I remember… it’s worth it.

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Posted in Kids and Parenting - Real Mommy Blogging