For those of you just joining us, today is part 3 of my self-absorbed series, dedicated to helping you all know me better. I mean, you know, more self-absorbed and “get to know me better” than a blog already is.
Ho. Lee. CRAP. You guys are starting to get deep. Sheesh.

Joe Says:

You have the opportunity to take a “brain pill.” This pill has two effects.

1. You will instantly become 50% smarter. Logic, reading comprehension, critical thinking, etc., will all improve by 50%.

2. Everyone will perceive you to be 50% less smart than you are now.

You’ll be smarter, but everyone will think you are dumber. Do you take the pill?

First, “everyone” will not think you are dumber. Only the people who are less smart than you will think that. It’s like a law of physics or something.
And as to taking the pill - Absolutely NOT. And do you know why? Because I’m already way freaking smarter than people usually think I am. (Yeah, really, even though I had to re-read that sentence three times and I’m still not sure if it sounds quite right). And it annoys the shit out of me.

I mean, sometimes it’s nice to be able to bat your little eyelashes and look all confused and “oh MY you are so smart” and puke, puke, puke. Shut up - it has it’s uses I’m tellin’ ya.

But for the most part? Being constantly underestimated and damn close to degraded is absolutely infuriating.

Mr. Fabulous Says:

How many women do I have to strangle during lovemaking and bury out in the woods before I come to the realization that the problem is me, not them?

Based on my experience? Six.

jennyryan Says (a shit ton actually…):

Have you always lived in Iowa? Do you like it? Would you ever live anywhere else?

Hell NO I haven’t always lived in Iowa. I mean, technically, I was born here, and I have lived here MOST of my life. But there is a small time when I was a child that I lived in Chicago and it’s just enough that I like to consider myself “from” Chicago.

Iowa isn’t all that bad. It’s just that there isn’t much here. As a teenager I was always adamant about “getting out of here”. But now that I have kids and all of their family is here, I appreciate it more.

However, given the right opportunity, I’d have very little hesitation about moving elsewhere.

Second, you talk a lot about the people you work with. I was wondering what kind of work you do, and if you enjoy it.

I work in advertising. Specfiically, I sell advertising to car dealers. I’ve always worked in some kind of marketing and for me, it’s more than what I do. It’s who I am. I love the fact that my ideas actually make a difference in someone else’s business. I’m very lucky in that I am very good at what I do and so the money - especially in Iowa - has always been good. And I really like money. :-)

And third, I always enjoy learning more about the people in someone’s life. So is there anything you want to share about any of your friends or family members?

I actually have a very small circle of “people” in my life. I just don’t have the time to maintain a gazillion relationships.

I have my family - the husband and two kids, my parents and siblings, my extended “grandparents, cousins, etc.” family and my husband’s family. I have a handful of close friends who provide me with sanity, advice and endless entertainment.

As far as something additional I’d like to share… I should probably give my husband a little more “face time” here. I mean, it’s pretty common that I disclose his dumb ass moments - because those are usually the funniest and most flattering for me. But he is also a pretty amazing guy. He’s a “nice guy” that I rarely gave a second look when we were growing up together and he was following me around school. He’s one of those people that everyone always likes - whereas I tend to be a bit more “controversial”, which I hate. And in general, he likes everyone, or at least is willing to give them the benefit of the doubt.

He’s not romantic, or passionate, or ambitious, or brilliant or any of the things that I always thought I would want in a husband. Instead he is loyal and selfless and strong and steady and everything that I discovered I needed in a partner. He is my rock and my safe place and the sane one who balances out my craziness.

And jenny loses 5 points for making me write all that crap.

Dave2 Says:

What’s your favorite cartoon of all time?

Well shit, I was kind of relieved because I knew I could count on Dave for something on the “lighter side”.

But seriously, fucking CARTOONS? You’re killing me.

But, you asked and I promised to answer so lemme think here. Favorite cartoon of all time…

Does The Family Guy count? Because that shit is hilarious. And sarcastic. And sporadic. What’s not to love about that?

And on THAT bizarre note, another session comes to an end. I think we’ll have this all wrapped up tomorrow, ending with a heart wrenching tribute to “what my life could have been” brought to you by Avi - of course.

Stay tuned. ;-)

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